熠熠生辉

下次期中考试

2011-02-23T08:35:00.002-05:00

考试一定要考好啊！下次期中考试～ 4月7日

搬家

2011-02-05T00:43:00.003-05:00

今天又搬家了。回想来美国的这一年半，搬了近三次家。我开始习惯这样的漂泊生活了。虽然有点不舍旧家，但是新家的感觉还是令人很好！开始怀疑自己不是恋旧的人了。

其实这次搬家也是不得已。原来跟美国室友住，他喜欢音乐，喜欢放音响，还喜欢开party。有几次都开到凌晨3到4点，我完全无法睡觉！我也只能熬到那个点。虽然他晓得我睡得很晚，但是他一开party，几个小时我几乎什么都做不了。特别是近两个月，他有点肆无忌惮。每个星期要开party两到三次，平时还要把他的女友带回来玩啊，闹啊。完全不顾及别人的感受。

一直都记得他有次凌晨三点问我是不是太吵？装傻也不用装到这程度吧。也许我太好说话了。我每次都跟他说没有太大关系。他就以为真没有关系？。。。也许他现在也没有想明白吧。

现在的室友是山东大学的一个教授，人挺不错的。他刚来一周，英文听力不行，我当他的翻译，陪同他办理了学校的各种事宜。我想我们应该会相处得蛮好的。

现在是困难的时候。

2011-01-31T00:28:00.004-05:00

现在的奖学金实在不能维持我的生活。每个月500元的房租用尽了所有的奖学金。只剩下70元，怎么活呢？

求人的滋味是不好受的。。。

我决定了，自己再苦再累，也不要求人。只有在非求人不可的时候，再去求人。因为别人帮助你之后的代价，我现在还不起。他们不理解我的难处，我也不希望让他们totally理解。至少这样我心理好受点。

从现在开始，每个月尽量不在外面吃饭。我的生活不允许我经常在外面吃饭，所以没有必要就他们的意思。我自认为，跟我做朋友的，我不会让他们吃亏。

每周五自己坐公交车去沃尔玛。

如果5月份后搬家，自己买个大包包，然后骑车到southeast，坐车去沃尔玛，然后从southeast骑车回住的地方。

我只要能够活下来就好了。

人其实活下来也蛮简单的，一个月400元生活费(100吃，300住),也可以活下来。有的人，一个月1800元，一个月也不够花。我就情愿做前者。

只要经过这几年的困难，我可以过得比很多人都好！

(转载) 看完有感，就转了。。。

2011-01-31T00:27:00.001-05:00

当坐飞机比从前做地铁还要频繁的时候，我拿着护照和登机牌独自托着行李走过一个个候机室，起飞又降落，为离开和抵达欢呼雀跃或失落，

不知道没人分享这些情绪时的意义究竟何在。

出国的姑娘不都是铁娘子，出国的男生也不是没心没肺的花花公子。

谁说的来着，出国就像A片，看的人爽，演的人不知道有多辛苦。

至少在我亲身经历了这些人和居住在异国他乡半年之后，我终于可以理智地看清自己和身边的这一帮出国留学的孩子其实大多差不多。说不上过的是好还是不好，只是绝大部分都很怀念曾经在家有人呵护的日子，尽管那时的自己，叛逆的反了天了。

我们独立，我们坚强，我们跟国内的朋友说话聊天的时候最回答不好的问题就是“你最近过的还好么？”

其实这句话根本就没法回答，因为我们的生活已经不知道要怎么样讲给你听你才能被你消化。

他们说“看你拍的那些照片觉得你过的好好啊。” “那里伙食是不是很好，看你脸又圆了。” “天天跟外国人在一起是不是特爽。” “你什么时候回来，回来我们一起去干嘛干嘛。”

亲爱的你不知道，其实这些话每次我们听到，都只想一脸苦笑地打下两个“呵呵。”

走着到学校的时候被风吹的头疼脸红。到了学校之后开始一天的学习，有中国学生在的课还好一点，没有同胞的话你就只好看着当地人开着他们熟悉的玩笑一帮人笑的前仰后合你一个人抱着书包发愁新发的作业要怎么完成。有时候一节课都说不了一句话，同学问你是不是不开心你无所谓的说没有我只是困了。

电脑坏掉了要装进书包里到处找地方去修，运气好有朋友能帮你但要赶两个小时的车程。你妈妈为了给你汇钱方便你不得不开个美元账户，然后每天费劲脑筋去想美元和加币的转换什么时候对自己最有利。

买几十块钱的东西都要心疼好一阵因为折合成人民币又是几张粉红色大钞没有了，在哪都会遇上给你白眼的外国人，黑人会在路上走着走着就抢道然后在走过你身旁的时候丢下一句“bitch”。

我还有一个很好的哥们儿他很坦白地跟我说不喜欢出国的姑娘，因为出国的姑娘没有国内的纯。

我苦笑着说你其实说的对，可是我们有什么办法。

哪个女孩不是在家的时候最被爸爸妈妈喜欢的。那时候我们在国内身边也不愁没人追，好的坏的想约的不想理的现在好多人是谁都记不清了。那时候我们也看少女小说，我们也为了电视剧里特别狗的剧情流眼泪，我们小时候也是玩布娃娃的，我们也曾经爱一个人爱的忘了自己是姓甚名谁。我们那时候曾经觉得爱着自己的那个男孩会一直对自己好直到结婚那我就也得使劲使劲对他好，我们曾经特别单纯，我们没一点坏心眼因为我们是看童话长大的。

出国了怎么了，我们硬着头皮一个人处理了好多在国内的男孩子长大后都做不了的事，可是怎么就被别人想的那么复杂了呢。

其实在我眼中出国的男孩子都很了不起。都知道妈妈很疼儿子的，他们一个人离开了家即使从前在家连碗都没刷过。我的一个朋友在加拿大起初的生活特别坎坷，丢过护照丢过钱包，被寄宿家庭虐待被学校不认可，可是他一个人咬着牙挺过来了这一切。我们这帮孩子都是在过生日的时候才发现一个个其实刚满十七八，但是这个世界早就不把我们当孩子看了。

姑娘们也失恋，出国的孩子们多什么了，我们也会失恋啊，我们也是孩子啊，失恋了谁不难受啊。

男生们也有感情上难过的事情，放不下国内的某个经历过的错过的女生，想关心一下她过的还好不好却发现自己再心不甘情不愿也得给她身边腾出个空来让别人去照顾她。

我们每天最怕的就是在国内的家人出些什么事情，尤其是老人。如果他们有什么意外我们赶都赶不回去。一个人想这种事情发生的时候都能哭出来。

不出国不知道想家，不出国不知道划着日子数着见亲人朋友的感受。

而我现在最怕做的梦竟然就是见到那些过往的朋友之后却找不到再回加拿大的机票。

我才发现我清醒了。在这里要待的不是一天两天十天半月，我已经是这儿的人了。

其实本来今天心情不好想写一篇骂人的日志来发泄，但是我不能。不能让冲动左右一个人的理智，在做什么事情之前必须动动脑子想想这样做行不行，有什么意义，会不会伤害到别人。

我没功夫也没时间消磨在那些电视剧情节一样的事情上，我有很多考试，我还有生活上的事情要去考虑，隔着一个太平洋，我真的很没空。

我只是觉得有些委屈，怎么我们在受到伤害的时候不知道该找谁依靠。任凭那些箭直愣愣地扎进胸膛却只能一人含泪拔出扔掉再不想多说任何。我们都明白不能靠别人，没办法靠别人，如果不能够好好保护自己，也不会有谁来救你。

其实我们真的不多什么。

我们得到巨大自由的代价只是只身一人，背井离乡。

我的表姐

2011-01-31T00:26:00.000-05:00

刚得知表姐面试还顺利，很有可能又回到她的母校，厦大教书。真为她高兴! 这么多年的漂泊，从国内到国外，又到国内，早就应该安定下来了。想起来近二十年来和表姐的情谊，想写点什么。

记得小学四年级，爸妈就一直想要我上个好的初中。我表姐当时在武汉外国语学校读高中，也是那个时候除华师一附中外，最好的学校了。但是外校有自己的选拔考试，要考奥数。于是爸妈在周末送我去她家，她抽空教我奥数，人非常耐心。记得我有题目做不出来，就老去问她，她也一直都不厌其烦地给我讲解。

后来，她被保送到厦大读英语专业。四年毕业后，她回到了武汉，去武大做了一名英语老师。这时，我刚上初中，英语成绩特别地差。每次被英语老师点起来去黑板上听写，也是老师数落的对象。他经常用他异常尖锐的声音去刺激你，想在他面前要好过，真的很不容易。记得刚开始英语课本都不讲发音，就模仿着磁带读课文。那么多单词，这么能记得怎么读呢，而且我很多发音都是错的。我于是就拿着一本许国璋的英语，每周末去她家，要她纠正我发音。之后，我进步很快，在英语启蒙学习上，也是多亏了她的帮助。

可惜时间不长，从厦门回来一年左右，她自己申请到全额奖学金，去美国读比较文学硕士。那个时候，我第一次听到比英语专业八级还牛的考试GRE和托福，表姐却以近乎满分的成绩通过了。其实现在觉得，专业八级还是难考多了。表姐从小都喜欢读文学书，特别是西方文学，是她的兴趣所在。以至于她每个月都要花很多钱在买书上，这个习惯一直到现在也没有改变过。她也一直跟我说，英语只是一门工具，她想要有自己的专业，所以选择了文学。但是，到现在看来，这条路走得真是太艰辛了。我也是很佩服她，佩服她一直都在坚持自己喜欢的东西，佩服她一直坚持自己想要的生活。

时间就这样一点一点的过去，我们都没有联系过。在那个没有网络的年代，电话费也是异常地贵吧。脑子里也没有打电话的概念。如果写信的话，总觉得要写英语，自己写不好。我只是从她家的电视柜上，看到她寄回来的几张照片，晓得那个遥远的地方很冷，她也结婚了，过得很好的。

2001年911，从电视上看到了那两座双子塔倒塌地惨烈场景，我们就开始非常担心表姐在美国的生活。记得每次见到姨妈，就询问她的情况。得知美国的局势不好，有好些人都回来了，他们没有安全感。不到半年，我表姐就和她老公就回到了武汉。近七年的旅美生活，在她身上明显地划过了岁月的痕迹。回武汉后，她在奶奶家住了一段时间，陪陪奶奶。我那时上高中，每天中午在奶奶家吃饭，可以见到她，跟她讲讲学习的情况，也听她讲讲她的生活。

没过多久，她顺利地去华科当英语老师。我们的生活都趋近于平和。这四年里，我在上大学，当然也经常去她家玩玩。考完了四六级之后，大三开始就不学英语了，也没有了动力。其实自己的口语听力还是很差，每次碰到她，也有问问她英语还要怎么学习。一次，听说我想考口译证，她马上找出一本口译的书送给我。她还推荐我每天都看英文新闻，听英文广播。她那段时间一直都在看英国的卫报，她让我看了一段，我才知道自己差距还是太大。

教书这段时间，她真的是一位非常认真负责的老师，付出了很多心血。每次节假日，都可以看到她抱回来的学生作业，每份都认真批改。我想哪有大学老师有这么改作业的。后来姨妈都说她，花时间太多划不来。记得一次元旦，我们都在奶奶家吃饭，她也把没改完的作业带来了，也就那一次，我帮她改过几本作业。后来才晓得，她布置的作业特别多，还有小测验什么的，其实就是把美国这一套教学搬到国内了。

工作了四年，她还是毅然决定辞职，去北京读博士，我也大学毕业去读硕士。她爸妈都不支持她这样做，我们也都不理解。说实话，就算现在，我开始理解她，但换作我，也绝没有那个勇气去做。人生应该开始安定下来的时候，她又用去了五年时间去选择漂泊（包括后来两年的博士后）。她认为她获得的东西，远比她失去的东西更加值得，她是去坚持她的文学理想。很佩服她！这五年的时间里，我们多用邮件联系。后来的GRE，托福考试，申请，她也给了我很大帮助。放寒假暑假，我还是可以在武汉见到到她。一次回武汉，她还托她老公找个英国人，帮我练习英语口语。太多太多了，真的很感激！

去北京签证那年，也算是最近一次见面了。研究生读完，我准备出国。她也博士毕业，准备去做博士后两年。回武汉之前的那顿饭，我们吃了三个多小时，畅谈了各自以后的打算和想法，到后来我赶着跑向火车站，真的很不舍。她就是这样一个人，虽然出生在知识分子家庭，却从来没有架子，对长辈尊敬，对弟弟妹妹关心，对亲戚朋友都是能帮的就帮，非常热心。每次跟她讲话都很亲切，因为是一个真正关心你的人在倾听，而且还在尽所能地帮助你。

虽然她以后不在武汉，有点小遗憾。但想想那里也是她的母校，福建也是她的祖籍，她应该比较习惯。再说气候比武汉好，真的对她来说是个很好的选择。教教书，带几个学生，她性格真的是很适合做这些，而且也会做得很好。好期待下一次和她见面。

我眼中的老印

2011-01-02T16:52:00.004-05:00

在迎接2011新年的晚上，和几个朋友在家里包饺子，边吃边聊。我们谈到了一个话题，就是中国人和印度人在美国的发展现状，大体上都认为中国人不如印度人。

一是，印度人比中国人团结。中国人喜欢窝里斗，说得好听点就是埋头苦干。举个例子，我朋友说他们一个部门有个印度人当了头，然后那个部门里之后就进了很多印度人。如果哪个中国人当了头啊，这个时候就会排斥同胞，生怕被一个能力强的同胞抢了饭碗。同时，印度人和中国人的关系是某种程度上不友好的。我朋友说他的老板是印度人，push他让他很难过。我说换中国人呢？他说那更槽糕，我想你们都懂吧。相比，老美是比较客观公正点。在学校里，也可以看得出他们团结。比如，第一个学期刚来的印度同学，他们的同胞都会帮他们找到校外便宜的房子。他们经常一大堆人住一个房间。比如，两个人住一个单人间是很平常的事情了。而我们呢，第一个学期，一般都会住学校里面。不能说我们有钱些，我想我们的传统是这样形成的。心想我们刚来的时候，都是住学校里面，也没有人帮我们找房子。你们新来的学生，也就住学校吧。也许有，但是多麻烦啊，多一事不如少一事。这样一来，中国人大多刚来就住学校里的传统，保持下来了。

二是，印度人比较aggressive。他们很会sell自己，很会把自己的优势展现出来，然后加以放大。举个例子，一个部门的印度人说他有一个idea，是世界独一无二的，最新的，一下子我们国人就被吓到了，老美也震惊了。后来才知道，他的idea有很多的限制条件，这些限制条件也是独一无二的，很特殊的。你说在一个特别perticular的条件下，你说你独一无二有意思吗？但是，你不可否认他是个new的，novel的idea。但是，在美国这样的社会里，aggressive性格，会给他们带来很多机会。他们可以在最短时间里，给对方留下深刻的印象。相反，中国人就humble啦，深怕别人知道自己好，这种心理居多。自己有好的事情，不喜欢与人分享，怕别人找麻烦，或者树大招风，等等。而且特别enjoy被别人努力发现你很好之后的那种心理满足感，然后还会得到类似于这人很谦虚的赞扬。不可否认，华人圈子里混，这种性格还是得要继续保持的！但是对待老美，就不一定work了！

第三，印度人英语好，虽然他们的口音真的很恶心。这个就注定他们会在social上强于中国人。第二点说了，他们很会sell自己，同时他们的语言也让他们能更好地表达自己。我问过他们，是不是英语为母语？他们说，印度语才是他们的母语，有教印度语的学校，也有教英语的学校。但是，如果你要进入好一点的学校，以后找好的工作，英语是必须的。相反中国人，普遍英语很差！印度同学跟我说，你们中国人口音都还行，但听力太差。你说你那个奇怪的口音，我们怎么会听得懂呢？但是老美却听得清清楚楚，是什么原因呢？这里扯到英语教学上了，是intonation的原因，不是pronunciation的原因。我们英语就算每个单词都发音纯正，老美就是听不懂。因为他们是听intonation的，听你一个句子中的重音在哪个单词上，他们就听这个，不是每个单词都听！所以，就算你pronunciation还行，没有intonation, 也是不work的！总结一下，英语教学听力和口语难度一定要加大才行，还有写作也是，如果你以后要用英语混饭吃，到时候还是得补起来的，要不然吃大亏。举个例子，现在老美对中国人英语都有stereotype了，有的时候他们都不想听你讲话。我一个读金融的同学，想说一个很简单的结论（忘了什么了，原来经济学学过的），要老师证实一下，刚一开始解释，老师就说听不懂。明白着，别人就不想听你说话嘛。我们得加油啊！除非什么时候Mandarin变成了世界语言，我们之前还是得努力学习English啊。新闻说奥巴马要派十万人到中国学习，感觉还是太少，但是也算进步啊！挺好的！有人说，会让政府给钱鼓励改良品种的日本人嫉妒，哈哈。

谈到在美国的华人，有很多都很成功。比如在学校做教授这块，中国人真的做得很不错。现在几乎什么学校里，好的差的，都可以找到中国老师。但是，政治上呢？也有成功的，比如前华盛顿州州长骆家辉，前劳工部部长赵小兰，还有刚就职的奥克兰女市长关丽珍，等等。但还是缺乏一些政治新星，现在离美国总统最近的，第三世界国家人选，我说有可能啊，就是印度人Bobby Jindal, 07年当选路易斯安那州的州长，当选时36岁，而且是当前美国在任的最年轻州长。奥巴马不就是政治新星吗？美国favor这样有活力的人，能够change的人。美国就是这样的社会，你越年轻，越有潜力，你可以获得很多机会，而且这里的机会很多。但如果你老了，你再去找工作，机会就很少。其实，国内也是这样，哪里都是这样。。。

我们和印度人都是第三世界的同胞，地位都不高，而且是处于互相竞争的态势。由于经常和他们打交道，有点想法，发点唠叨。先说到这儿吧。

~减肥记录~要坚持啊！！晚上不吃饭！！

2010-10-01T20:06:00.026-04:00

8/27 181 lb
9/8 179 lb
9/18 176 lb
10/1 171 lb
10/10 172 lb 归咎原因，是晚上吃了很少的饭，或者面。看来还是不能这样吃。。只能吃面包。
10/15 168 lb
10/18 170 lb 上周末请客吃了大餐。。。还是少吃为好啊。。
10/22 168.5 lb 晚上只吃两片面包，，还是有效果些。。。坚持！！我的目标：154 lb
10/26 166.5 lb 中午也要吃少点。。。
10/29 166.5 lb 运动前 167.5 lb
11/1 165 lb 周末吃了两顿buffet, 怕长胖了，连着两天晚上都跑两个大圈。还瘦了！运动！
11/4 164.5 lb
11/8 163.5 lb 早上10点左右空腹查的
11/10 163 lb
11/12 162.5 lb
11/15 158 lb 上一周减得有点多，原因是没怎么吃饭了，就吃面和面包。。
11/17 161 lb 难道这两天吃好了？
11/25 160 lb 医院的数据。今天早上下巴又掉了，难忘的感恩节！
11/29 155 lb 不晓得称得准不准，要注意身体！多吃点！
12/8 156.5 lb
12/14 157.5 lb
12/16 159 lb 今天晚上吃得太多了！看来明晚还是不吃了！
12/22 156 lb
1/3 159 lb 最近貌似有点反弹哦。天天晚上吃饭，加上运动也少了。要注意哦。
1/17 154 lb

克服拖延症～

2010-04-07T21:37:00.000-04:00

回想自己，发现自从上大学，也许逐步养成了这个习惯，之后愈演愈烈。这样常常容易使自己处于一种极端焦虑的状态。看到同学的日志，发现这个已然是一种症状，需要与之作战。。。

下面是转载的一段对拖延症的介绍。。。

拖延症的形成
1．一个人认为自己5天之内可以做完一件事情，所以在离deadline还有15天的时候一点不着急，直到最后只剩5天了才开始。
2．这种紧迫感和焦虑往往促发人的斗志，会让自己觉得，自己只有在压力状态下才有做事情的状态。
3．最后拿到成绩的时候，成绩往往不是很差，这样子就强化了自己最适合在deadline之前短期高压的状态下工作的心态，并且对以后的行为不断进行自我暗示。这部分非常符合大部分有拖沓习惯的中国学生的经历。因为中国学生往往非常聪明，所以哪怕最后只剩一点点时间了，也会完成得不错；从而自认为自己最适合这样子的工作状态。周而复始，反复循环。

拖延症的其他特点
1．没有自信。因为每次完成任务都达不到自己最高的能力，对自我能力的评估会越来越低。 2．我太忙。我一直拖着没做因为我一直很忙。
3．顽固。你催我也没有用。我准备好了自然会开始做。
4．操控别人。他们着急也没用，一切都要等我到了才能开始。
5．对抗压力。因为每天压力很大，所以要做的事情一直被拖下来。
6．受害者心态。我也知道自己怎么会这样，别人能做得自己做不到。

拖延症的浅层原因
1．太难
2．太耗时间
3．没有相关知识技能
4．害怕别人知道自己做不好

拖延症深层原因，以及解决方法

1．完美主义。所有事情都要达到一个很高的境界，要一次做好，所以不愿意匆匆忙忙开始，要万事俱备才行。解决方法：对自己说现在的状态就已经很好，可以开始了。每有一点进展都鼓励自己。意识到一点错误都不犯是不可能的。伟大的作家，诗人，艺术家都是断断续续完成他们的杰作的，自己也可以如此。

2．抵制与敌意。这个老师对我态度太差了，所以我不高兴作他布置的作业。解决办法：要意识到，不完成作业受害的是自己。不能仅仅因为一个老师的态度而影响到自己的前途。

3．容易颓废。任务太难了，或者别人都不需要做我干吗要做，不能忍受持续做这件事情，等明天再做吧。但是往往明天到了，心里还是不高兴做，又继续往后推。解决办法：寻找一切可以找到的帮助，设法降低事情的难度，取得进展；暂时推迟自己想要放弃的心态，每天能多做一点就多做一点。这一点也很符合很多中国学生的现状。因为不是人人都对自己的课题感兴趣的，所以容易产生厌倦感，所以不容易定下心来完成相关任务。解决的办法如上所说，向别人寻求帮助，听取建议，同时可以把任务分成比较容易的小块，化整为零，告诉自己其实每一个小部分都很容易就能完成。

4．自我贬低。如果常常不能很好地完成任务，自己对自己的能力的估计会越来越低，即使以后完成好了，也认为是运气。解决办法：接受别人对自己工作的赞扬；自己对自己进行勉励。

拖延症治疗的步骤：
1．意识到自己的拖沓是完全没有必要的
2．把拖沓的原因一条条写出来
3．一条条克服这些原因
4．开始做事

张启发院士给他的博士生的一封信(转载)

2010-04-01T22:47:00.007-04:00

　谈做学问兼论人生——读各人工作计划后看法点滴。
最近我拜读了各位送交的年度工作计划，仔细推敲后，仍感到有三个方面的问题十分严重：
　　第一，对课题理解不够，有的根本谈不上理解，做了不止一年，尚未进入角色。
　　第二，已经完成的工作量严重偏少，博士（有的是从本室硕士上来的）做了几年还未见到可以发表的东西。
第三，在计划中倾向于以最低工作量结束研究。即游击战法。以消耗最少的人力来解决战斗。
　　这是从纸上看到的。从实验室看到的现象是，有那么几位常不到实验室照面，似乎这里是一个可来可不来的地方。而且愈未进入角色的，愈不钻研文献；工作做得愈差的，愈少见做实验。请各位想想，你不学，怎么能变内行？你不干，怎么会有结果？不钻研与自己课题密切相关的文献，不把实验室工作放在头等重要的位置上，不能算作一个名副其实的博士生。
　　写一点专题读书报告，其实是一个领域内进入角色的好方法。一篇不够，可以连续写几篇，直到把与研究课题有关的方面较好地弄懂为止。如果在写读书报告的同时，加进一点自己的见解就更好了。写得好的可以送出发表。这对加强业务能力，提高写作水平，深化对自己研究工作的感情和培养事业心都大有益处。几年来我们大会小会说了很多，而至今交得很少。有人说是没有时间，我看是不愿投入时间。对博士生而言，每天工作12小时是正常的，少于这个时间就不正常了；每周工作六天半以上是正常的，少于六天半就不正常了。我这里是基于美国PhD四年学制所得到的概念。在我们目前三年学制还要强制性学半年英语的情况下，上述时间的投入充其量也只是一个下限。
　　人生一世，应该追求有所建树。记得有一首诗：“朝为田舍郎，暮登天子堂。将相本无种，男儿当自强”。此诗所描述的虽有些封建意识，倒也道出了人生的真谛。想稍加以补充的是在男女完全平等的时代里，女儿也应当自强。走到了做科学这条路上，博士生阶段有无成就与将来有无建树关系十分密切。椐我观察，在我们这一代人中凡是后来有所成就者，大多在博士学习阶段就奠定了很好的基础。我理解的基础含三个方面的内容：一是广博的知识和不断求知的欲望；二是作为今后发展基础的工作成就；三是不断进取的奋斗精神和以工作作为第一需要的人生观。试想：要建功立业，博士生阶段不搏，更待何时？
　　有的研究生说，在我们这个实验室读研究生如何如何辛苦，在有些地方读研究生如何如何轻松，入错了门的委屈和追悔不及的心情溢于言表。我不知道是该“轻松”的羡慕“辛苦”的，还是象我们“辛苦”的研究生这样羡慕人家“轻松”的。但就我看来，身在国家级的实验室里，从事着国际前沿的研究工作，要做的工作都有相应的保证条件，大可一展才华，以慰平生，应该受到全校乃至全国的羡慕，而不是相反。对“轻松”妄加羡慕的人，其实是没有弄清楚为什么读研究生这个最起码的问题，或者是读研究生的动机本来就存在问题。他们读研究生所看中的大约只是一张文凭，自己对自己就不抱成才的期望，这种思想倾向是应该下大功夫纠正的。
　　我们这里几乎所有的人都希望博士毕业后到国外去做博士后，我很赞成，并愿尽我之力给予支持。我很希望我们实验室出去的人将来在国际上都成为知名人士。今后在我们室毕业的博士出国做博士后可能主要有两类途径，一类是经我提名推荐，另一类是博士生本人争取，而将以后者为主。而后者却意味着要参与国际竞争。博士论文做得好，竞争性就强，我也乐意推荐，用人方也愿意接收。博士论文做得不好的，我不愿意推荐，而且推荐起来难度也大。其实，各人的路在各人自己脚下，各人的命运在各人自己手里。成败兴衰，全在各人，请各自勉。

故梦～

2010-03-31T21:21:00.002-04:00

《故梦》改编自台湾著名历史小说家林佩芬女士的半自传小说的《故梦》，放寒假的时候看的这部电视剧，前几天又回味了一番，很令人感动。。。

特意把莲君写给天恩的信，记下来了。

天恩：
我明白，你把很久以前写下，并一直没有寄出的信，终于交给了我，是在为接下来前途未卜的冒险做临行前的告别，为一次可能发生的永别，留下了心声。而这次冒险，很大程度上，基于你对我心思的猜测，你断定我期盼着少白与兰君的团圆，便心甘情愿，为这个未曾求证的判断付出了不可预知的代价。我得承认，这一次猜中了我的心思，但却只猜到了一半，还有一半与你有关，你却忽略。那便是，我失去你的痛。是的，我会痛，这是一种无以名状的痛，它已经开始，始于那一日窗外无意间的知晓，并在接踵而至的每一个夜晚凝重的发作。但我终于还是决定，不去阻止你，我不能阻止你，像一个真正的男子汉那样的行动。天恩，一直以来，大家都在质疑你的男子汉气，我曾经以为，你对此不以为然。但看了你的信，知道这其实是你最大的心结。躲在世外的你，其实想要入世，做人间的英雄，或至少是社会认同的男子汉。齐家治国平天下，治国平天下，那是你祖上的辉煌，可到了你，如你所说，在历史车轮滚滚向前时，却在一个深深烙上了前朝印记和历史乱象的家庭中，尴尬地生、尴尬地长、尴尬地爱。现在我明白了，别人的鄙视已经让你难堪，而自我否定更是你最深重的痛。那么现在，当我确认你我身心一体，并将永远一体下去，就让我用放手来成全我的丈夫，成全他一个重新评判自己的机会，也成全他的亲人们。这是几经挣扎后的决定，它带来的或许是一场生死的巨变，也或许是一场凤凰涅盘。无论结局如何，我都已经将你的冒险，当做我自己的冒险；将你可能的牺牲，也当成了我自己的牺牲。记住，不管发生什么，我都将与你一起。更期待的是尘埃落定后，我可以送给你一个特别的礼物。天恩，我记得你告诉过我，希望在我留下来的理由中，有一点有你。当时我没有说话，现在却想告诉你；实际上，一直以来，我比你看轻了自己，看轻了你置于我的分量。而其实，终究是你，不是别的，支持了我在陆家的坚守。这是一个秘密，深藏在我心底，我早已洞察，却不允许自己承认。而现在，是该承认的时候了。天恩，其实真正懂你的是秦砚。她曾经仔细分析了你的成长背景，现在想来，那番话一定是出于她对你长久的用心。而那时的我，只顾了自怨自怜，没有真正领会到她的良苦用心。她其实是希望我能从精神上延续她对你的体恤、呵护，而我一直以来只想到你辜负了我的爱情理想和婚姻的理想，觉得你有负于我。却没想到，其实我也有负于你的，我用二十年来的冷漠在惩罚你，让你的二十年，生活在欠债的阴影里，实在也是一种残忍。说到开启，真正开启你的是燕笙，而我难副其名。说到爱，素琴的爱，是你最该感动的，她对你，是忘我的爱。天恩，想家了吧。刚才在梦里，你呼喊着阿玛、额娘，还在叨念清平阁，说要带我们大家一起回去。感情埋在梦里是辛苦的事情，你这样多时了吧，不说出来，一定是怕扰了我们的心。我知道，这一次你只会为少白筑路，而不会自己行走，因为你的挂念，留在此处的我们。还想告诉你，二十年前的你，没有今日的鼾声，但今天你的鼾声在我听来，是最温暖的乐声。记住，这是我们共同的冒险。你在海上，我在岸上，无论结局如何，我们都共同面对。而最期待的，则是尘埃落定时，可以送你特别的礼物。莲君

第一次做鱼

2010-03-21T22:27:00.002-04:00

来美第一次做鱼，感觉还不错。原来都不晓得哪个地方可以买到便宜些的鱼，上周去沃尔玛算是找到了。这个味道，真是久违了啊！！

水管坏了

2010-03-21T22:15:00.002-04:00

家里不知道哪个地方漏水，导致上个月有30多刀的水费。跟村里打电话叫人来修，修了两天还是找不到哪个地方漏水。第三天，村里的人叫了外面专业人士来修，终于算是修好了。来了两辆大车，五六个修理工，把厨房的墙都打穿了。原来这个管子用了五十年了，里面有很多沉积的东西，所以就破了。。。

还有就是小费的问题，我善意的问问他们修好了，要不要什么手续，签字之类的。村子里的那个负责人说不需要，除非给小费，旁边的一个修理工还指着他的衣服说，都弄破了，很辛苦的样子。我这个时候就慌了，给多少，每个人都给吗？于是打电话问老徐，他说要给的话，也不能太少，但是总共不要超过20。还是感觉太多，于是写信问CSSA的同胞们。幸亏写了信，大家都告诉我不用给。因为我不是房东，要么给也是房东给。每个月我们都交了一些维修费给了房东，就是村里办公室的。这个修理工是房东请来的，如果他要小费，可以跟村办公室说去。

春假的聚餐

2010-03-21T22:09:00.002-04:00

正值春假，佑遥和她室友来我家吃饭。这个小女生蛮好玩的，很活泼，总是感觉她有讲不完的话。于是做了一桌好菜，算是展现一下我的手艺啦。。。

佑遥自从来美国，胖了近20磅。心里想想，这些美国的东西真的不能吃，幸好我是自己做饭，几乎不在外面吃。要不然，就是自己怎么胖起来的，都不知道哦。胖了要想减肥下了，那可就困难了。。。

鸡蛋煎饼

2010-03-14T23:15:00.002-04:00

今天还是10点才起来，因为昨晚2点才睡。本来9点多醒了一次，但是感觉还没有睡够，所以又懒了一下。看来还是要早睡早起好，主要是一编程起来，晚上容易搞得蛮晚。上真的是效率感觉高些。

早上起来还是做鸡蛋煎饼，这个真是好吃啊。饼是在沃尔玛买的墨西哥的Tortilla。
查了一下，中文解释是：玉米粉圆饼：由稻米或小麦面粉制成的一种不含酵母的薄面包，在较热表面上烘制而成，通常置于豆类、碎肉或奶油之上吃或包着这些东西吃。

当然，我们利用它不是包着东西吃，而是做鸡蛋煎饼！！先把油倒到锅里，然后把饼放进去，煎个一分多钟，就放个鸡蛋进去，然后把鸡蛋搅烂。注意这个时候，鸡蛋几乎还没有开始炸。怎么煎鸡蛋呢？？多亏江波再次教给我了诀窍。这个时候，把煎好一面的饼，用筷子翻个个，鸡蛋就流到锅里不是？然后再把饼放在流到锅里的鸡蛋上，现在鸡蛋不是在饼的下面了？呵呵！这样再煎个一分多钟，鸡蛋煎饼就做成了！可以放点葱什么的。盐不需要放，因为tortilla本身有味道的。

这个方法，来自于师兄江波，他们也特喜欢吃饼啊，面啊，包子，饺子之类的。相对于武汉，他们是北方人。因为好吃，再就是原料便宜，(ps, tortilla一袋20个，1.73刀; 鸡蛋也便宜，18个，1.95刀)这样，大家就传开了，我们都说你可以申请专利哦。算了一下啊，我吃得多点，每天早上兼4个饼子，用2个鸡蛋，成本是1.73/20*4+1.95/18*2=0.346+0.217=0.563 ，等于3.8元。当然，我其实一般就吃两个饼，然后吃点面包啦。

3月8日

最近家里发生的事情

2010-03-14T23:14:00.001-04:00

自从言言上幼儿园后，爸爸就回来了。鉴于现在我的情况，爸妈也非常担心。只好又去找点事情做。
刚刚跟妈妈通了电话，才晓得爸爸为什么先说买车，然后又不买了的原因。为了这个事情，妈和爸还吵了一架。爸爸实际上已经把车买回来了，后来看到别人开车撞了人，又把刚买的新车给卖了，还亏了四五千块钱。
现在爸又去开运垃圾的车，原来就做过，做个两个星期后，就没有再做了。这个事情是个苦差事，每天早上4点起来，一直干到中午12点。有时候下午还去一下。这样工作八个小时，还是蛮累啊。
还有个值班的工作，一个月六百块钱，但是爸没有去。工资太低，妈妈也在唠叨他。爸爸还是在尽他努力做事情，希望妈妈不要太唠叨。其实现在不是你们赚钱的年龄了，应该是我赚钱养家的时候了。

3月7日

第二次看到大海

2010-03-14T23:09:00.003-04:00

今天是元宵节，和恒还有菊秀三人一起去了一个叫灯塔的地方。那个地方可以看到大海。。。

车快速行驶在路上，但我们感觉不到有50mile, 我和菊秀看着沿途的风景，陌生又熟悉。在一个新的国度，自然景观当然不一样。但我总是喜欢把一个新的地方，和自己见过的地方进行比较，找寻似曾相识的，熟悉的感觉。看来菊秀也是这样，我们都不约而同的说出了”东湖 ”，感觉和东湖的某些风景相似。。。

灯塔现在已经废弃了，只把他当作一个观赏的建筑。那蔚蓝的大海，伴着霞光的照射，真是美不胜收。。。

记得上次看到大海，还是94年在深圳蛇口呢，坐着海船去珠海。。。没想到平生第二次看到海，居然是在16年后的墨西哥湾。。。

岁月匆匆。。。

这里的自然景观保持得特别好，我们观赏的地方，是一块湿地。。。

2月28日

元宵节

一天没有上网

2010-02-22T22:15:00.002-05:00

慢慢习惯了没有网络的日子，感觉又像回到了从前刚上大学的日子。

记得大一和大二的时候，我就是在没有网络的日子下度过的。平时上课完了就去教室或图书馆自习，然后吃饭，然后中午回去睡觉，下午再去自习，再去吃饭，吃饭后又接着自习，晚上回寝室。虽然寝室里有网络，但是室友的电脑，我也不好多用。

周一到周五的生活就是这样，周末回去然后看看电视和电影，那个时候的生活真是过得惬意。没有什么压力，然后学习成绩也总是一二名。其实大多时间也都是我一个人。。。我比较习惯享受一个人自习的生活。。。

我非常怀念那个时候的生活，毕竟在有了网络之后，每天就花了很多时间在网上。在网上找资料，在网上看新闻，是我每天必须的部分。这样的生活持续了近五年，即大学两年，研究生三年。这五年的生活对我也是极其重要的，完成了一个重要的过渡，从国内读研到国外读博。

现在我就是需要这样没有网络的生活，这样的学习才能够使我的心能够沉静下来。以前每次碰到难题的时候，心情很浮躁，就不自觉地去上网打发时间了。

现在我必须要上网的时候，去工程学院，步行只需要不到五分钟。然后把要上网的东西都准备好，就像我现在写日志一样，写好了，然后抽个时候再上网发表一下。

编程也是在本机上编写，然后再到服务器上去调试。我的这个感悟，其实还是多亏了哥点醒我！其实学习主要是来源于课本，来源于书籍，不是来源于网络。网络上的东西都不是权威的，很杂乱无章，绝对不能每天花太多时间在网络上！！

这个周末的两天，我就是在寝室里看书度过的。虽然效率不是很高，下午总是要小睡一下，但是有时间的保证，还是完成了一门课的复习。

马上还有一门课的复习，从晚上开始吧，连续看三个小时！本来打算去工院上网的，查查邮件什么的，但是发现根本没有必要！要是去了，就又会白白浪费至少一个到一个半小时！

今天做了laundry，一个月一次啊，主要是洗一次要近2刀，太贵，所以攒多点衣服再洗。

看看窗外，天已经黑了下来，只看到那路灯发出那暗弱的黄光。寂静的夜空，勾起了我对家乡的思念，打个电话吧。

2.21 日傍晚，6点50分，塔城

Shutter Island

2010-02-22T22:07:00.001-05:00

刚刚和DL看电影回来。这个是我来美看得第二场电影，shutter island。记得第一次看的是2012，和国内同步上映的。这个片子是悬疑片，看到结尾才知道原来男主角自己就是个疯子。唉！让人意想不到！男主角是演泰坦尼克号的男主角，演技很不错！他在这个片子里是个marshall，自己的妻子疯了，妻子把自己的三个孩子淹死了，他把妻子杀死了。于是他疯了，他虚构自己的妻子是被人放火烧死的，然后来到shutter island来找那个杀他妻子的凶手。shutter island是其实是一个精神病院，男主角在这里接受治疗已经两年了。医生为了治疗他，然后按照他的意志和他玩了一个game。目的是让他清醒，从自己的幻想中走出来。最后他终于明白了一切，但是明白一切后，他又回到了自己的fantasy中。令人惋惜的是，医生不得不最后对他实行手术，因为他对island上的其他病人都有威胁。

最后说说电影院，和武汉的影院布局差不多。想想也是，国内都是从国外学的嘛。这边人的普遍在公共场合素质还蛮高，影片从头到尾，都没有听到任何手机的声音和谈话的声音，很安静。这部片子应该还不错，值得推荐！今天我这个厅里一个位子都不剩下，全部坐满，还有观众因为没有位置就走了。因为是周末去看的，电影票价和国内差不多，10刀。平时周一到周五上午都是半价。比较下两个国家的人均收入，国内的票价真是太贵了！

2.20日晚, Tallahassee

新的电脑背包

2010-02-22T16:02:00.005-05:00

我周一在网上买的swiss 包刚刚送来了，但是心里有一点不快。毕竟周一买的时候是35刀，到周四再看的时候，就降到了28。恨不得马上退了，再订一个。但是退货我要自己寄过去，要付邮费，至少要5刀吧，这么大个东西啊，也不想折腾了。虽然原价是80，花35已经很便宜了。但是美国就是这样，品牌打折的程度，是很多的，1折，2折都有。比如我刚买了一条dockers的裤子，原价48，我花了13刀买的。这里买东西，就是要等，只要等，就会有便宜的deal。以后吸取经验吧。。。

Swiss gear的包，就是瑞士军刀的牌子。这个包有几个优点，也是我特别想买这个牌子包的原因。第一个，也是最重要的，就是laptop backpack，后面有一个口袋专门可以放我的15.6寸的本本啊。原来国内带来的包就是backpack，书和本本放在一起，我怕本本被书压坏了，还专门搞个布袋子装了本本，再放到包里，别提多麻烦了！而且好多次跑步去赶校车，本本就和书在里面晃动啊。那厚厚的书和本本互相碰撞，想着都对本本损伤太大了，还摔了几次。这个专门的口袋可以把本本固定起来，很结实。第二个，这个牌子的包属于户外运动的包，很结实啊。第三个，我很多同学都用这个包，看来很流行，性价比也很高。第四个，这个包里面的口袋真是多啊，只要是你想到的东西，都可以找到专门的口袋放进去。呵呵，还有一个小口，专门留给耳机线从包里穿出来，好人性化的设计啊，赞一个！

看看原来的包，我用了近8年了。李宁的牌子，是缜姐在我02年，上大学送给我的。好像是175元，那个时候真的有点贵啊。对这个包很有感情了，记得我这8年里，很爱惜地用她，就是在非用不可的时候才用她。比如每周末，我从学校回家，带一大推衣服和书，就要用她咯。再就是一般出去玩的时候，春游秋游，也必须有她陪伴。她陪着我去了西安，陪我登上了海拔2100多米的，华山的西峰！后来又陪我去了福建的永安，在美丽的贡川古镇里面穿行。。。去年我又带着她来到了大洋彼岸的美国。。。

想到每次用她，都是把她装得满满的，毕竟是我外出唯一用的背包啊。也许我再爱惜点，她也许不会有好几个破的地方啊，都是压的。。。

这个包的最大优点是，很轻！这么轻的包，陪我用了这么多年，可以说是很结实了。

当然她不会退休咯，现在的swiss包重得要死！平时出游的时候，我还是会考虑用她。但前提是要找块布，把里面的破面缝补好。爸爸在出国前给我缝了一些，哪晓得又破了好多啊。现在我这里是没有可用的布。。。等以后补好了再用吧！

2.20日中午，塔城

过年～

2010-02-17T11:28:00.004-05:00

第一次没有和父母一起过年，有点想家的感觉。而且又是在异乡，自然更没有过节的气氛。幸好大姨妈他们来了，和表姐一起吃了个团圆饭，但感觉和平时没有两样。

表姐在美国生活了有10年了，已经习惯了不过春节。由于没有节假日，所以很多时候，春节就是在上班中度过了。今年春节正好赶上了周末，自然有时间感觉一下过节的气氛吧。

第一次也没有在电视前看春晚了，下了视频看了部分节目，小虎队太令人感动了。于是乎，在网上又狂搜他们原来出道时的所有歌曲，视频，图片，评论。。。直到现在还在回味他们的歌曲。。。他们让我想起了我童年最快乐的时光：周末去妈妈那里，唱歌啊，听歌啊。。。还有去红钢城的闹市区买磁带。。。苏有朋的，吴奇隆的都有。。然后回到家，马上放在随身听里，带着他们在公园里散步。。。

学生会其实也组织了春节聚会活动，因为去表姐家，所以就没有去成。其实真的很想去那里，认识一下其他的朋友。。。以后还会有机会吧，毕竟和家人团圆还是我很看重的。。。

周末又去了教会，也许又和GOD近距离接触了一次，但是我还是没有感觉到。。。

虽然感觉不到GOD，但是我仍会祝愿GOD能保佑我的爸爸妈妈身体健康，保佑我们。

(转载)The First Scenery under Heaven “The Yellow Crane Tower” Wuhan

2010-02-17T11:18:00.001-05:00

2010-02-16 15:51:13 - With out a second though, the best place to shop, stay or explore the most serene and tranquil beauty of China is Wuhan.

Getting its fame due to the Iconic “Yellow Crane Tower”, Wuhan is China’s one of the best cities to live in the modern day China while being able to explore the ancient China. As a matter of Fact, Wuhan offers great prices and great shopping and in my visit it was the only city where I could find some multicultural food too. My accommodation in Wuhan, though a four star hotel was a match for a five star. And as far as flights are concerned, cheap flight to Wuhan are easily available over the internet reservation. For more details on cheap tickets to Wuhan visit: www.travelhouseuk.co.uk/cheap-flights-to/wuhan.htm

Wuhan’s ultimate attraction is the Yellow Crane Tower. Its cultural significance led to its being made the symbol of Wuhan City. Situated at the, Snake Hill in Hubei Province yellow Crane Tower not only attracts tourists form round the globe but it is also a recreational spot for the natives. It is one of the most renowned towers south of the Yangtze River. The buses drop you about 10 minutes walking distance from the tower as no traffic is allowed in closer proximities. The tower is not only a mesmerizing historic attraction but also there are a lot of shops just at the door way, where you can find almost any thing you can think of. Mainly, the wooden gift items, cooper metal pieces and some Chinese traditional items are the best buys but do not forget to bargain. As you cross the door way and see the amazing yellow crane tower right in front of you, the wonderful architecture is self explanatory to have won the title of 'The First Scenery under Heaven'.

According to legend, Yellow Crane Tower was built by the family of an old pothouse owner named Old Xin, living in Wuhan City years ago. The pothouse was in a very poor state and the family was hardly able to make ends meets. One day, a shabbily dressed Taoist priest came to the pothouse and asked for some wine. Old Xin paid no attention to him, but his son was very kind and gave the Taoist some wine without asking for money. The Taoist priest visited the pothouse regularly for half a year when one day the Taoist said to the son that in order to repay his kindness, he would like to draw a crane on the wall of the pothouse, which would dance at his request. As he finished his drawing, the crane came to life and was the most beautiful crane ever seen. When people in the city heard of this, they flocked to the pothouse to see the dancing crane. The Xin family soon became rich and they built the Yellow Crane Tower as a symbol of gratitude to the Taoist priest. To date, there are bronze yellow cranes in the court yard of the Yellow Crane tower in memory of the event.

The main tower, called the Yellow Crane Tower stands 51.4 meters (about 168 feet) high and has five floors. The appearance of the tower is the same regardless of the direction it is viewed from. The roof is covered by 100,000 yellow glazed tiles. With yellow upturned eaves, each floor seems to have been designed to resemble a yellow crane spreading its wings to fly. On each floor has a theme, for example, the theme of the first floor is about legend. On the wall, there is a nine-meter (about 30 feet) long and six-meter (about 20 feet) wide painted porcelain picture which depicts clouds, rivers and cranes to represent a romantic mood in the heaven. The third floor mainly shows poems written to praise the tower in different dynasties. On top of the tower, visitors are treated to a fabulous panoramic view of the Yangtze River, its bridge and the surrounding buildings in Wuhan City. Outside the tower, there are bronze yellow cranes, memorial gateways, pavilions and a small turquoise pool ornamented with lilies and a small bridge that make it look surreal and dreamy, a beauty - unforgettable.

http://www.pr-inside.com/the-first-scenery-under-heaven-the-r1725886.htm

挚爱小虎队～

2010-02-13T14:15:00.005-05:00

刚刚在搜狐里看到了小虎队今年春晚的表演，真是激动啊！！仿佛又让我会回到了童年～

他们的歌曲，那么纯真，令人感动！

记得上小学的时候，那个时候特别迷他们的歌曲，蝴蝶飞啊，青苹果乐园，红蜻蜓，爱，叫你一声my love。。。只要电视里有他们的歌，马上放下作业，就冲到电视机前。那个时候，我住在姨妈家，和罗蔓姐姐一起听他们的歌，一起冲到电视机前。。。。收音机里也到处都是放他们的歌～小学就是在他们的歌声中度过的～周末到妈妈那里去，也有机会听很多小虎队的歌。。。

后来小虎队的歌没有那么流行了，他们解散了呀，于是开始听吴奇隆的歌，祝你一路顺风啊，烟火啊，也听苏有朋的歌，背包，珍惜。。。感觉是小虎队的延续。。。

太喜欢你们了～永远支持你们！

晒衣服

2010-01-22T12:18:00.003-05:00

昨天下了很大的雨，学校都淹水了。我的鞋子也是全部透湿，几乎是躺着水去图书馆的。这里的雨就是这样，一下就特别大，但是时间不长。多是阵雨。昨天是因为要赶车，也没有办法躲一躲。

今天天气大好，晒下被子吧。整个冬天都没有晒过。

美国这边的社区，没有人在外面晒衣服的，据说影响环境，他们都是用烘干。我住的地方比较特殊啦，外面还有晒衣服的绳子？！我总结了有两个原因，第一个是中国人特别多，这里是叫学友村，Alumni Village, 只有在学校工作的学者，和学习的研究生才能在这里住。（本科生在校内有宿舍）。大家把风俗习惯带过来了，方便我们，也就牵了晒衣服的绳子？(有待考证)。第二个，也许本来美国人都有晒衣服的习惯，只是现在都没有了？因为我这里的房子是上世纪60年代，给退伍老兵住的。房子比较破旧，设施也陈旧。说不定那个时候退伍老兵也是在外面晒衣服呢？

感悟？麻木。。

2009-12-28T21:50:00.003-05:00

妈妈把老家的房子卖了，准备我下学期的学费。我不知道能说些什么，他们一直在电话中安慰我，我的心情其实没有那么痛苦，也没有感觉到前所未有的压力，也许痛苦过后已经麻木了。。。也许是人到了一定年龄，没有了奋斗的激情了？

从小学到现在，父母从来都没有为我的学习省心过，

中考考进了重点中学，为了上快班，交了4000元。其实中考，本来可以考得更好的，体育拉了我10多分，但是更努力点呢？？回想起来，中学是我学习最刻苦的时候了吧

高考，考砸了，其实也是我预料到的。本来最后关头，我的学习劲头有不如以前，调考考的很好，怎么高考就不行了呢？父母找人托关系，让我有本科可以读。但是每年的学费是普通的两倍。

研究生，也是没有考上理想的学校。我是跨专业考，计算机专业课复习不到位了，这就是原因。结果，那年我跑了两个月，搞调剂的事情，终于调回了本校研究生。

没有想到，现在读博士，也让父母担心。我真的是不应该。。。快26岁了。。。也许该放弃的应该放弃吗？我不甘心。。。

父亲一直在内心觉得，我在做超出能力范围之外的事情。。。亲戚，和家人也很容易这样想。我如果不是一直觉得不甘心，我也不会在美国，其实。。。

从来美国到现在，我一直没有找回我原来的那种学习的劲头。有点厌学情绪，我是不是无可救药了？

我不敢把我的真实状态告诉任何人，告诉谁都会让他们更加担心。。。

如果不学编程，学其他的，我会如鱼得水吗？

午睡

2009-12-06T16:19:00.002-05:00

刚才午睡做梦，梦见我大学的英文老师，给我送菜，她就住我这附近，马上要搬走了，有点舍不得她：）搞不清楚时空了，不晓得是在美国我住的村子里，还是在我熟悉的东院。也许是后者多一点，毕竟在那里呆了7年。当然也有可能是前者。。。

最近是期末，有的转校，有的毕业。。。我一个邻居马上要转校走了，刚来了半个学期。她很多东西要卖，上午在她家淘了个锅。。。

今天终于把AUP的所有project都做完了，但是延期完成。希望明天老师能开恩吧。我忙到今年早上5点。11点半起床，3点钟实在困的不行，就又睡了。居然做白日梦，睡的时间太长了吧。

下周考试周，有三门，明天就开始考第一门。。。

考完speak test

2009-12-03T18:59:00.002-05:00

昨天刚刚考完speak test, 感觉比上次要好。但是还是有几个没有说好，有点小紧张吧。不过至少都说了。感觉问题不大，应该可以过。明天去跟Maria说说看。

下周要考试，两门吧，一个automata，一个unix programming。这两科都要好好复习，要不然后果很严重啊。

今天是周四，就从今天开始复习。

advanced algorithm 周一

unix programming 周二

automata 周三

God bless me!

继续相信自己

2009-11-21T12:09:00.002-05:00

作业已经拖了不能再拖，第二个要交了，第一个还没有做完。

我应该沉下心来，一点一点的写吗？我感觉我现在是闭门造车，很浪费时间，又达不到效果。

我已经没有办法再这样下去了，再相信自己一天吧。这今天效率都不高，感觉做一天一点效果也没有，就不自觉的自暴自弃了，上网看看新闻，上上ＱＱ，打发时间了。时间真的过得很快啊，还有三周吧，就快要放假了。

当然假期也很短，也是三周的时间。很多人都选择回家，我其实也想回去啊，最主要的原因是大姨妈他们要来，也算是亲人来相聚了，没有理由回去看爸妈了。

回去又怎样呢？不就是看看爸妈，然后在亲戚家走动走动啦，然后窝家里上网咯。想想也挺没有意思的。如果回去，仅仅两周的时间，一晃就很快过去了，等我回来又马上投入到下学期的学习中。时间太紧张了。

明年暑假吧，如果我不做ＲＡ，就回去一个多月吧。如果做ＲＡ，其实也挺好的，踏踏实实学点东西，自己必须要付出比别人多的努力才行。

相信今天我的编程作业有一些进展！！

加油吧！

中午１２点２２分

塔拉哈西

我是怎么了

2009-10-31T21:22:00.003-04:00

现在不晓得怎样，有些畏难的情绪。找不到原来那种天天努力学习的劲头，的确，好久都没有像这样学习了。

现在的学习，说实话，强度不是很大，但是很难。就是不晓得你要付出多少努力。对于会的人来说，真的很简单，有很多业余的时间。而对于我，就是很难，一个问题要想N多时间，都想不出来。不晓得怎么办才好，学习没有效果。。。

由于原来有脂肪肝，现在不再随便熬夜。平时最迟就1点睡觉了，早上总是8点多才起来。我感觉应该自己要少睡点，但是一少睡，白天看着电脑都可以打瞌睡。真的不知道怎样学这些课程，我只晓得我的方法肯定是最花费时间的方法，而且性价比很低，就是没有很多成效了。

今天是万圣节，门口贴了个字条，"sorry, no candies"。好似没有人来敲门了，呵呵，还是有点效果吧。现在的心情，真的和节日联系不到一起。

妈妈打来电话，我也不知道怎样跟她说我的情况。她说要我多问同学，但是我不晓得怎么问同学了，问题太多了，唉。。。

平生第一个钱包

2009-10-30T23:36:00.005-04:00

今天和江波师兄一起去买东西。因为他们圣诞要回国，要买很多东西送人。我们顺便就去了Ross和Marshell两个店，这里一般东西都打到至少5折。

买了平生第一个钱包，$12.99，fossil。（不晓得是什么牌子，反正自己用了。如果带回国，就买CK的了，其实价钱都差不多了。美国人其实都不讲牌子。）因为这边用卡特别多，平时放在书包里。买东西的时候，就容易带了这张，忘了那张。比如今天刷卡就忘记带photo id了，还跟收银老太太说了好半天。

今天买了酒，准备请客用的。但忘记带ID了，不能买，还是师兄帮我付的。唉，好麻烦！这里的ID就是驾照，我又没有驾照，只有用护照当ID。

后来，听说一个店，叫Old Navy，里面东西巨便宜。今天姐也说我的钱包有些贵，看来在这里买东西，有很多学问哦！

晚上去了教会，听了一个加拿大来的牧师讲的马太福音里The parable of the workers in the Vineyard。大概讲的就是葡萄园里请工人去工作，早上6点请了一批，早上9点第二批，中午12点第三批，下午3点第四批，下午5点第五批。最后6点半收工，结果最后一批5点来点先给工钱，1钱银子。接着第四批，一直到早上6点的第一批工人，都是给的一钱银子。

看似不公平哦！最后来的先给工钱，而且和比他先来的工钱给的都是一样。

但是，牧师讲了，其实最先雇佣的人，其实是最被人看重的人，他们虽然工作时间长，但是很早心里上就得到了放心，因为今天可以赚钱了，生活有了保证。最后雇佣的人，他们心里是不好受的，因为一直到下午5点，都没有人雇佣他们，有可能今天就没有钱吃晚饭了。但是这个时候，葡萄园给了他们工作，他们应该感恩。所以大家都是平等的。

(转载)和麦兜响当当一起逛武汉

2009-10-29T22:30:00.002-04:00

和麦兜响当当一起逛武汉

默认分类 2009-09-28 14:39 阅读72 评论2

字号：大中小小

麦太说：“武汉，一个卧虎藏龙的城市，你孕育了热干面，孕育了鸭脖子，你也该孕育
下我的快快鸡了。”

武汉真是个可爱的城市。

电影里熟悉的武汉街景，真的好感慨。等我自己看了，也好激动！我在这里生活了二十几年，这一切都好熟悉，好亲切。民众乐园、沿江大道、户部巷、大桥、龟山电视塔、武汉港……采的点都很准啊，仿佛抓住了我的神经！

废话不多说了，和大家分享下电影里可爱的武汉图图。

新民众对面，佳丽广场

好彩的游轮，貌似叫“某鑫号”。长江长江!其实一块五一次的渡轮才是我的大爱

户部巷，好多好吃的！

这个地方去了无数次，很有地标的感觉。

沿江大道，很有老武汉风情。

拆了的洪山广场

湖北卤拼……

热干面，我很喜欢吃的！上次还跟一老外翻译成，HOT DRY NOODLE呵呵

渡轮+长江一桥第一次坐渡轮的时候我真的好激动

长江一桥和武昌的天际线

黄鹤楼的月圆之夜，马上就是中秋了，祝大家中秋快乐！哈~

生活圈子的狭小

2009-10-24T23:38:00.002-04:00

听着光良的"你好吗"，一种莫名的感触，让自己想写点东西。不知道父母还好吗？虽然经常通话，但是不晓得他们的生活到底怎么样，希望和我在他们身边没有多大区别吧。妈妈每天上班，爸爸每天也是去那边，每天有些事情做，对他们也好。但是也希望他们不要太辛苦，特别是妈妈。

这边生活依然很单调，从没有这样感觉到自我的存在。生活圈子的狭小，感觉离开父母，就没有生活圈子了。的确，从高中开始一直到研究生毕业，10年里一直都未有离开过家。反而小学到初中还经常住在亲戚家。大学里没有课，还经常往家里跑，呵呵。研究生最后两年忙申请，绝大部分时间都在家里了。父母一直在照顾我的生活。

这种性格让我除了和家人的圈子外，就没有其他的圈子里，比如朋友的圈子。所以到这边，有时候不是很会和人交往。戴H问我，哪有那么多话跟家人说？他说他从大学就离开家了，现在早都习惯了。

朋友的圈子，在国外尤其重要。把自己封闭在这边，每天都是一个人，一个人的生活，没有和人交流。。。这种生活真是单调。现在慢慢也习惯了。。。还是想找个室友，但是我是个不想改变的人，习惯了这样，恨不的五年就住在这里。骨子里有种随遇而安的惰性吧。也许找个女友？呵呵，我这种性格也许不是很讨女生喜欢吧？这种性格，没有给很多别人认识你的机会。

哥也说要多和人去交流，多和人去交往，我真的要改变。。。

好久也没有去看哥了，不是不想去看，只是不想被他说一顿。他总说，做事要有目的。。。没有事情去看看他，其实也无妨。。。主要原来去过几次，就谈谈两句，也没有什么话说了。呵呵，人总是很矛盾哦。

离别

2009-10-10T23:28:00.003-04:00

今天楼上的师兄要回国了，真有点不舍。两个月来，他每个星期都带我去买菜，又带我去办事情，耽误他不少时间，真的很感谢他。今天是他最后一次带我去买菜了，去了沃尔玛，还去了一个跳蚤市场。那个市场居然很多都是直接从国内运来的东西，商标全是中文，很便宜，就是国内的一元店了。晚上做了些小菜，一起吃了个饭。他还说我做的不错，有鱼有肉，其实还要多多练习了。希望他今后工作一切顺利！以后希望在广州，能再遇到他。

AUP 编程作业

2009-10-06T19:26:00.003-04:00

明天要交AUP的作业，今天几乎还没有什么思路。问别人，别人也不可能一点一点的教你。只有靠自己了。神啊！求求你救救我吧，我几乎要绝望了。

今天通宵！！！

一定要搞出一点出来！！

后天还要算法考试，还没有怎么复习呢！

我应该怎么办啊？？？

我要置之死地而后生吧! 希望这个学期的忙碌，是我今生前所未有的，考研，高考有这么忙吗？至少还可以一点一点的做，有点思路，可以查参考书，不像现在，一点思路都没有，几乎在挑战我的极限。

7点38分，马上用15分钟把对话搞定，明年的英语课要交！

给姐的一封信

2009-10-03T18:33:00.001-04:00

YL姐，

中秋节快乐啊！

现在状态很糟糕，自己基础是差太多。我选的课程太难，我问一个武大师兄，他们说别人以为你很强，才这样选的。我哪晓得，我无非是听老师的话而已。师兄说，这个选课的事情，老师肯定是希望你早点把难课选完，然后跟他做研究。我也不想承认自己很弱，毕竟是拿support的。另一个拿support的，（我们系大陆的，今年就2个）他很强，原来还在印度去实习过，上过的课是原来学过的。我还想问问他编程呢，但是他好似不是蛮好接触，他做作业都独立完成的，不和人讨论，要和他搞好关系。发现在这里，学习都要求别人，真的很不习惯。要不然，连个讨论的人也没有。

我们系状况也很不好。那天问到一个师兄，他去年拿了support，今年就没有了。他准备转学，待不下去了。他状况不好，他说这边作业很难，不讨论根本做不出来。但是，我发现，我不晓得怎样去学会讨论，毕竟讨论是要在一个基础上的。我现在是要别人能教教我。

我们这边，师兄他们的状况也都不是蛮好。至少都是还不错的学校毕业的硕士，哈工大，川大，华南理工，都到两年半才准备过博士资格考试。那个武大的师兄，到了3年才过。感觉还是蛮强的人，要很他深谈一下。他只说，一般第一年，计算机的都很学的很惨。系里要求有硕士学位的人读博士，一年内过资格考试的。国内教育还是和他们的要求相差太多，何况我原来的学校，要求更低了。

我现在上课还是有很大问题，那个算法课，印度老师教的，几乎都听不懂，有口音的关系，本身内容难也是原因。上次quiz，绝大部分都没有做，几乎白卷。这个课程其实是有先修课的，叫算法导论，国内研究生期间没有认真学，相当于没有学。本科的信息管理基础还是占自己很大部分，国内研究生不注重课程学习，所以硕士学的课有很大的水分。

前几天晚上，正在忙作业。等一个同学回来，问他怎么做。先说好一起去自习的，结果他没有去。打电话问他，他说他临时有点事情，10点半才回来。结果，他看国庆阅兵到12点才回来，结果搞到2点半才回到家里。昨天早上看email，说就那天晚上我住的周围发生了枪杀，心中好一阵后怕。唉，真的不能再这样了。。。

我还选了unix高级编程课。编程也有很大的问题，没有什么实际的项目经验，很痛苦，当初考GRE，也没有到外地找个公司去实习，和一起进来的那个同学差很多。

下周要期中考试，我在复习。我现在问题是，问的太少，上课能有一半听懂就差不多了，问题堆积会很多。上次想问个师姐算法题，她也很忙。问老师，哥说又不好，老师上课讲的东西，下课又要问会很显示自己很差。TA没有中国人的，他们主要也是grading，问了两次，都收效不大。

我甚至有时候再想，我是不是该学计算机的，但是不学也不行，其他专业就业都不行。来到美国，是我曾经梦想的。当实现这个梦想后，发现自己还有很多方面没有准备好，去接受这个梦想带给你的压力。我这人其实是有些盲目的，看到别人都出国了，我也想出国。虽然实力不如别人很多，但是心里总是不甘心。总是觉得自己不差。但是在现实中，又不得不承认自己的差距。

那个时候，选择换成计算机专业读研，也是有点盲目。根本谈不上喜欢，就是想以后好就业些。拿到那个学位，估计就业面广些，这点也是无容置疑的。以后进学校当老师，计算机也是很广。也许我一直都在做自己不想做的事情，其实自己还是喜欢信息管理专业的一些东西的。财务啊，经济啊，会计啊，统计啊，我那个时候也都学的很好，不过本科的课也简单。

不好意思，过年过节的，跟你说这些。

中秋节快乐啊，有时间多出去走走，对身体好！
10.3 日，塔拉哈西

Homesick

2009-10-02T12:09:00.005-04:00

真的不知道，现在自己会处在这样一个状态。下周的两个期中考试，还有一大堆作业没有做完。自己应该更加抓紧时间的。但是我感觉自己学的很吃力，学习方法有问题。上课效率低，下课又要复习，从头开始看，时间花得好多。很多都看不懂。

当人们都在看国庆阅兵的时候，我前天晚上正在忙作业。等一个同学回来，问他怎么做。他到12点才回来，结果搞到2点半才回到家里。昨天早上看email，说就那天晚上我住的周围发生了枪杀，心中好一阵后怕。唉，真的不能再这样了。。。

楼上的师兄12日就回去了，回到他生活的地方，广州。想到和广州一样的大城市武汉，那个我生活了25年的地方，此时感觉有无比的想念。他也说早都想回去了。他回去是做医生。而我呢？如果我回去，就一无所有！当时我就是抛弃一切，没有找工作，来准备出国留学。准备了两年，终于达到的自己的目标。在别人的眼中，我是幸运的，我很有毅力。我却感觉，在两年的时间里，刚开始，的确是有毅力，想达到目标。但是到后来，感觉自己是有一些固执，习惯了一直这样的努力。也习惯了准备出国留学的这种生活。如果没有拿到OFFER，真的自己没有退路。估计就待业在家里，然后再申请一年了。和现在相比，那个时候的生活真是很幸福。

我有点想逃避就业，才选择这条出国的路。如果自己能在武汉找个教书的事情，我想我估计也不会出来了。我的目标是进高校当老师。找一个稳定的工作，和自己心爱的人过着简单的生活，教育子女。也不想赚很多钱，也不想进公司，过周末加班的那样生活。作为一个男人，算是没有事业心的了。如果可能，以后就想一辈子生活在武汉。。。

按照我这人的性格，如果不出国，在武汉，估计一辈子会碌碌无为。环境太安逸，人也有些懒惰。周围的环境会让我不想去奋斗。我相信环境可以改变人，我希望自己在美国能有所改变。

来到美国，是我曾经梦想的。当实现这个梦想后，发现自己还有很多方面没有准备好，去接受这个梦想带给你的压力。我这人其实是有些盲目的，看到别人都出国了，我也想出国。虽然实力不如别人很多，但是心里总是不甘心。总是觉得自己不差。但是在现实中，又不得不承认自己的差距。

那个时候，选择换成计算机专业读研，也是有点盲目。根本谈不上喜欢，就是想以后好就业些。拿到那个学位，估计就业面广些。也许我一直都在做自己不想做的事情，其实自己还是喜欢信息管理专业的一些东西的。财务啊，经济啊，会计啊，统计啊，我那个时候都学的很好！在我的记忆里，研究生没有从老师那里学到任何有用的东西。真怀念大学那个时候修课的生活！

现在的状态，就是挣扎的状态，struggling。我在想，人的一生真的很短暂，等我顺利读完phd，就30岁了。现在还没有女朋友，结婚，都是一大堆事情。现在根本不想考虑。不晓得自己是不是在逃避，很希望有这样一个人，但是，我已经不晓得怎样才能找到这样一个人了。。。

爸爸妈妈很辛苦。妈妈的糖尿病是我一直担心的，爸爸高血压，也不注意身体。从小到大，一直都在照顾我。一直到25岁。按理说，应该早点离开父母，有自己的生活了。但是人到了这个年龄，还呆在家里，对父母有一种不是我这个年龄应该还有的依赖。很强的依赖。现在我必须适应自己独立生活！如果以后结婚，我也还是想和父母生活在一起，他们也需要我的照顾。我希望一直陪着他们。。。

Labor Day

2009-09-05T15:24:00.002-04:00

The first festival after I arrived will come next Monday. It is the Labor Day. I originally thought that the Labor day is the May 1st worldwide, so when I heard of that, feeling a little unexpected. I will have a long weekend, no classes on Monday. Actually, there are many activities, such as welcoming the new students in village which provides free lunch, dinner and KaLa OK. And also exciting football games on Monday night, against Univ. of Miami. There are usually many activities during the the first semester, which is similar as when I entered the college and graduate school later. I recalled that we went outing in Sen Lin Park, and tried to get to know new classmates. But the feelings are different when people get older. However, is it a good chance to know new friends? However, the things that I have to do first is finishing the homework and preparing for the courses.

These days, I get used to use the computer in lots of libraries on campus, doing homework and contacting my friends. The computer can be only used for browsing, checking emails and the most important, learning. And also it cannot type in Chinese. But I can browse the Chinese news. I have no laptops. It is funny that one girl used QQ when we were having classes, the QQ message alert sound came out!! I bought a dell laptop online, and it will be delivered in two weeks later. (Some classmates suggest me to buy Macbook, but too expensive.) The best way for me, is to adapt to the life without a personal computer.

Best regards to all my friends.

New life in US

2009-08-30T14:43:00.001-04:00

It has been almost two weeks since I arrived. Everything looks fine at this time. Class begins. But courses are really tough. And I will be too busy to write anything at that time. But I will try to write something interesting and funny here, to let my friends know and share my feelings.

Climate:

Everyday is sunny here, but I bring an umbrella in my bag, for showers usually occur in the afternoon. It is hot in the daytime as Wuhan, yet night is cool, and I need to turn off the fan. The daytime is quite long, the sky will become dark until 9 pm at night. I heard my classmates said the hottest months are June and July, so I may buy an air conditioner next year.And now a fan is just enough.

Food:

Although it is a small town. However, I can buy anything you want to eat here. There are at least two big Walmart here, you can buy vegetables, fruits, milk. Also there are food stores of China and Vietnam, you can buy Zheng Jiang Vinegar, Soy source, Lao Gan Ma, Rice, Dou Fu(I really like it!), Italian noodles,(not like Re Gan Mian).

The Chinese Buffet is really cheap here, only $5 for lunch, which is cheaper than Macdonald's. I went twice. One restaurant named "Super China". There are Chinese dishes and foods, like dumplings, noodles, Bao Zi, Chun Juan, and Dou Fu. Another one named "Hong Kong", which is even cheaper than "Super China", but it contains less dishes.

People:

People is really nice here. There are several times, when I look at the map and don't know where the building is, someone will come by and ask me whether I need help or not. Also, sometimes you will see someone will smile at you and say Good morning or hi, when I enter a building and in the elevator.

The CSSA(Chinese Students and Scholar Association) here is really a family for us Chinese students. There are usually volunteers who take a ride and go shopping with us. Yes, without car, you can not go to Walmart.(But there is also buses to Walmart. The bus comes every one hour, and I need to change buses for one time.) Absolutely, no car is a problem for me for a long time in the future. I don't plan to buy a car in the first year. And I even don't have any experience of driving in China. So I need help from others for a long time.

My life:

I settle down now, living alone, cooking by myself. I eat rice everyday. Today's lunch, I bring the rices and dishes which cooked yesterday. I have classes on Tuesday and Thursday for the whole day. Also grading assignments to perform my TA duties.

Best regards

又去电脑城了

2009-07-25T09:27:00.002-04:00

这篇应该早就写了，但是国内上blogspot居然上不了。现在打开曾经的标题，本来应该删去的，但是让我记起了一些事情。我就写两句吧。

那天应该是最后一次去电脑城，买了鼠标，U盘吧，准备带到美国来。美国这些东西都很贵。呵呵，真怀念在电脑城里瞎逛，然后到处砍价的日子。顺便还逛逛华师，武大，群光广场，等着我回来吧。。。

真的很怀念那样的日子。。。

10月2日塔拉哈西

风景如画的人间天堂——云南雨崩村

2009-05-13T06:04:00.004-04:00

人间天堂----雨崩村
神瀑的路上
在雨崩村看到的梅里
五冠峰的另类风彩

雨崩晨曦

从这里去往神瀑
雨崩村里随处可见的彩绘

雨崩下村---三江客栈所在地
进雨崩路上的风景垭口上飘动着五色的经幡

进雨崩路上的风景
充海神秘感的山谷

因为喜欢对香格里拉，梅里雪山的神往，有想去转山的愿望。于是查了查攻略，得知去看梅里雪山，一是在飞来寺，但是去雨崩村就更好了！

转载一个雨崩村的介绍

雨崩在我心目中一直是世外桃源的代名词，曾经反复地看过中央电视台的《雨崩村的故事》，通过一个摄影师的镜头，美丽而又与世无争的雨崩村深深地烙在我的心里。上次去云南大雨，雨崩村成了近在咫尺的遥远思念。
飞来寺去雨崩要先到西当，这段可包车，从西当到雨崩就没有公路了，只能途步。我们中午十一点到西当村，西当村口有很多的骡马，可以帮驮李和人，找了一匹骡子225元驮所有行李到雨崩三江客栈，我们一行轻装途步进雨崩。

去雨崩的路还算好走，沿途风景很美，只是一路上行使人感觉有些气短。沿途每隔一、二小时会有休息站，从西当到垭口我们基本上是一路吃过去的。在第一个休息站遇到店老板正在做馍，据说是用玉米面和着面粉，然后放在炉子上烤熟，馍很大，有小面盆那么大吧，外焦香，内软甜，店老板本来是做给自己吃的，不对外卖，我们说了半天好话她才同意给了我们两个（因为她没有面粉了）。

第二个休息站里坐着个年轻的小伙子，休息站的柱子上挂着羊头做装饰，棚子内燃着灶上放了一口很大的锅，里面热腾腾地煮着牦牛肉汤。去年在海螺沟和九寨沟吃过牦牛肉，当时觉得那个难吃呀……..可是这里的牛肉汤太香了，一点怪味都没有，真的，肉嫩汤鲜，去雨崩时强烈推荐试试这里的牦牛肉汤。

大约走了四个多小时上到垭口，垭口也设有休息站，不过这里人多骡马也多，有点兵荒马乱的感觉。过垭口就一路下行了，路相反不是太好走，因为是土路，灰尘很大，前面人马踏起的尘嚣呛喉，眼睛都睁不开更别提看风景了。从垭口到雨崩下村竟然走了近三小时，真是累呀！相机、鞋、衣裤全是灰尘，经过七个小时的长途跋涉到雨崩三江客栈时，我们已经是风尘仆仆。

雨崩村没手机信号，没网络，没通电，（有小型发电机不定时发电）也没热水，当晚住三江客栈，老板兼老板娘阿鹏炒了几个菜，在昏暗的烛光中我们胡乱吃了些，趁着朦胧月色去逛村子。村中小路上不时会踩到牛粪，走到村子尽头，神瀑客栈家今天有喜事，专门从德钦请了歌舞队来表演，见到我们这些外来的游客，表演队里的姑娘小伙兴奋地邀请我们加入他们的篝火舞会，并要求和我们对歌，大家又唱又跳地玩到十点多才余兴未了地回客栈休息。

阿鹏第二天被邻居邀请去帮忙杀牛，去神瀑时我们和阿鹏同行，杀牛的场面真的很血腥。只看到几个壮汉把牛摁在地上，我们吓得赶快跑了。等从神瀑返回时，那牛已经变成牛肉了。店老板见我们是阿鹏的朋友，专门请我们留下吃烤牛里脊，牛里脊只放点盐巴就放在铁盘上烤，味道那个鲜美呀！（据杀牛的人说这种里脊肉是没有卖的，每次杀完牛后都被用来犒劳帮忙杀牛的人了）。

告别时我们也顺便买了些牛肉回三江客栈煲汤，在三江客栈我几乎用尽了阿鹏烧火的柴，高压锅花了将近四个小时，煲出了色香味具全的牛肉土豆汤！那天晚上我们一帮驴友们差点被牛肉汤美死，而三江客栈的老板兼老板娘阿鹏差点被饿死！

A Wuhan walk-through (转载)

2009-05-13T05:33:00.001-04:00

A Wuhan walk-through

www.chinaview.cn 2009-05-13 10:28:06

BEIJING, May 13 -- When I first step on the soil of Wuhan, the capital city of Central China's Hubei Province, a humid wind from the Yangtze River, noisy crowds and the Wuhan dialect immediately surround me.

The Yangtze River is one of Wuhan’s most well-known hallmarks and has lured travelers for centuries. China's longest river, the Yangtze runs through the city, endlessly telling the legends of generations gone past. When looking through the windows of the bus, I spot the river’s running waters darting past between buildings and hear its current rushing by, excited and antsy.

With the Yangtze River’s mystique, visitors often imagine a picturesque and serene river flowing rapidly by, but they may be disappointed by the slow moving river as it walks slower to observe the busy city and hear the gossip of its citizens. Revered as the cradle of Chinese civilization, one can almost feel the mighty river's history as it meanders through the city just as it has for thousands of years.

Locals will tell you that there are two ways to experience the river’s greatness, walking its banks or crossing its broad body by ferry. I chose the latter. Feeling the breeze through my hair, smelling the freshness of the waters, I looked toward the horizon where the sky and the waters seem to meet, dreaming of one day swimming in the river.

It seems impossible for visitors to understand Wuhan dialect, but I enjoy watching local people heaving the words in an up-and-down tone. Once I noticed a Wuhan local talking on the phone, his cadenced tone reminded me of Huangmei Opera, a local opera from Huangmei, Hubei Province. Learning local dialect is one of the joys of traveling, but, try as I might, I only learned a few words. Fortunately, Mandarin and English go along way in Wuhan’s increasingly globalized streets.

Like a fashionable girl eager to put on her skirt, Wuhan skips spring and jumps directly to the embrace of sweltering summer. For the summertime visitor, the city’s sweltering heat and sticky air inescapable, but fortunately the heat had yet to descend on the city in early April, allowing me to soak up Wuhan’s variety in comfort.

One of ancient China’s cultural centers, Wuhan’s imperial heritage jumps out at visitors nearly everywhere. Visitors are sure to hear from proud locals of the legend of the Yellow Crane and the 1,700-year-old Yellow Crane Tower, which sits prominently atop the Snake Hill and is one of the most famous towers in South China. The tower, first built in AD 223 during the Three Kingdoms period AD 220-280, is renowned for inspiring the Tang Dynasty poet Cui Hao, who wrote in his famous poem Yellow Crane Tower.

Though the original tower collapsed in a fiery blaze and the current tower only dates to 1984, reading the inscription of Cui's poem, one can still feel the original tower’s grandeur.

A central hub, Wuhan is always full of visitors, but I still felt overwhelmed as I watched as people thronged through the city’s narrow alleyways, especially Hubu Xiang, an alley renowned for its street food and a must-see for every visitor. One particular treat is “tofu skin,” a favorite Wuhan delicacy.

After a full belly and a voyage on the Yangtze, no trip to Wuhan is complete without a visit to scenic East Lake. While not as famous as the well-known West Lake in Hangzhou, the lake is still the perfect place to wile away an afternoon enjoying the breeze or boating. Unlike the bustling Yangtze River, East Lake’s slowly lapping waves bring peace and tranquility, encouraging one to reflect on how much Wuhan has changed and how much it still remains the same.

(Source: Globaltimes.cn)

纪念汶川大地震一周年

2009-05-12T09:52:00.006-04:00

回忆去年我们经历的那场地震，我历历在目。那时候正好在公汽上，准备去大姨妈家送yl姐姐。609开到附一医院时，就看到街上突然有很多人聚集在一起，很奇怪，接着，听车上人说黄石地震了。等过了桥，到武广，街上简直是乱了，全是人，大家都在往天上看。现在我的才确定，是地震了。楼顶在晃动!

一直到下午四点多钟，在网上看到了汶川大地震7.6级的消息。汶川是哪里？从没有听过。里县，茂县，绵阳，绵竹，北川，青川，德阳，映秀，这些陌生的地名，在我耳边回荡而变得熟悉。简直让人无法相信，这次地震如此巨大，涉及面如此之广，死亡人数也是从2000到4000到8000......成倍数地增长！

回想这些，我的心情无法平静。人的生命真的很渺小，很脆弱。记得虽然那段时间我在准备GRE，很忙碌，但是每天总是不自觉的去看新闻，看直播，一下子几个小时就沉浸在里面。很担心，很牵挂那里的情况。。。

真想什么时候去那边看看，去年还有想当自愿者的冲动呢。以后吧，5年之后，或是10年之后，旅行对我来说是奢望，现在。。。

写完这篇日记，就默哀三分钟吧。今天忙论文抽签，真的很不顺利。居然被抽中了外审，而且许Y也抽中了。就三个签，我和她一块去的，就都抽中了，感觉真的是小概率事件。。。10%的外审，被我抽中了，唉，又要好好改下论文了。自己的论文借鉴别人的太多，心里虚得慌。

算了，现在最重要的是签证，我一定要先把签证过了。其余的都好说，无非是很紧急但不是最重要的事情，所以我把论文放在第二位。分清主次，是最重要的。以后到美国，估计人会非常忙，这样的情况也会出现吧。很多事情聚在一起，所以一定要头脑清楚！我这人有时总是想把什么事情都做好，结果什么事情都做不好！

我料想的最坏的情况，无非是审不够，打回来再修改呗。答辩的时间往后托，我那边也不是急着要去报道。等签证回来，去找找老师，让他们给点建议吧，毕竟写论文还没有老师指导过。

4.15，回顾我的申请故事

2009-04-14T23:34:00.007-04:00

今天是4月15日了，第一次才体会到这个日子的含义。昨天晚上把其他两个offer据了。也就是昨天才收到，想去那个学校的I-20。这样据offer起来也就更加保险一点。You never know what will happen! 毕竟已经经历过一次I-20上的钱被搞错的事情了。

心里有点庆幸，据的那个女老师没有为难我。我不习惯于叫她教授，因为教授给人很老的感觉。她很年轻，很优秀，很成功。她在上海读完本科去新加坡读的5年博士，美国1年博后就当助理教授了。今年是她第一次招学生。

但是心里感触更多的，是觉得很对不起她。她是第一个在我录取后祝贺我的人。我那时还纳闷，这个中国人，真的很nice，一查主页，原来是个美女啊！一丝好感。我在想，怎么没有先注意到她呢？因为申请前，我就套了这个学校的一个印度教授，但是他后来又变卦了，说自己已经资助其他学生了。女老师的来信，让我意识到，这就是论坛上说的反套了，她就是我的机会了！她，让我在1月底，就看到了今年申请的一丝曙光。她很坦白的说她有一个RA, 但是funding还没有下来。下面就是对我的考查了，从春节她发给我第一篇paper起，让我写comments, 前前后后不下二十多篇。还有reading list上，我没有看的一些。真的很感谢她!

这几个月来，看paper, 写comments，发给她，她回复我。我告诉她今年大使馆的签证人很多，background checking 很花时间，她就帮我问小秘处理我offer的进度。她还和印度教授到chair那里协商，一起当我导师。而且offer上的钱也是她一个人给的，印度教授没有给一点。今年的金融危机，学校都cut funds，所以他们也很难有钱招学生。

拿到这个offer，自己付出了很多精力。当中还出现了两次小插曲，以至于现在拒掉她，心里感觉有点空。第一次是系里的小秘把钱搞错了，offer letter上一个数字，告诉international office少了5千多刀。钱不够，就催我寄资金证明。第二次，是我收到了international office的I-20后，又发现钱比offer letter上多7千多刀。唉，女老师说他们要重新做I-20。不然怎样去跟vo说明呢? 为这事情，她还特地打电话给我解释。心里想到，拿这个offer过程挺曲折的...

我写了一封道歉信给她，写了我和她之间这三个多月来的故事，她对我的诸多帮助，并请表姐帮我好好修改了下。她很nice, 说她feel sad, but saying congratualations to my new offer。然后还鼓励我以后学业上的成功。特别是，她说，如果我到那边学生和生活有什么问题，还可以和她联系。我很感动。我想她肯定心里不高兴，但是她在回复里没有丝毫表达出来。我真心祝愿她能招到她想要的学生，and success in her tenure track career。

拒掉的另一个是TA offer, 是十几天前才收到的，有点意外。但也在预料中，毕竟联系过的教授回复很positive。这个教授很牛，有在microsoft工作的经历，从大学到博士都是在美国读的，是亚裔，感觉也好沟通些。专业排名七十多，综合太差了。钱也不多。以后想进学校当老师，读博学校的综合排名也很重要。

准备去的学校，TA offer 真的是很意外。没有联系到任何教授，仅仅就向小米询问材料到了没有。我申请定位不高，她算是我想去的学校之一。

这段时间的纠结，总算是告一个段落了。也许有一天，我也会处在她这样的位置，我应该学习她对学生的态度。她第一次招学生，系秘书和international office怎么都会在routine work上犯错？要是换作是我，我肯定会crazy。祝福她！也许到那边以后，n年之后，我们可能在某个meeting上遇到。不晓得她会不会记得我，我肯定会认出她的。我一辈子也就经历这一次申请，应该是终生难忘的。

广州之行

2009-03-28T00:44:00.012-04:00

很久时间都没有写博客了，今天是个有雨的周末。清明时节雨纷纷嘛！也许这样的天气，容易让人思考和回味。决定把去年的广州之行，好好的回忆一下...

广州之行，计划外的旅行......

11月初，10月18日的托福成绩出来了，给了我一个不小的打击。过大多数学校的线，但这个分数对我的申请是个硬伤。我必须得再考一次了，而且要赶在1月1日前把成绩送出去，考虑送成绩要至少两周，那么12月15日左右得出成绩。还要考虑复习的时间。另外，找考位是非常困难的。花了一个星期找中介刷考位，武汉没有空位！最终，我不得不去外地考。给在广州的表姐打了个电话，于是就有了这次广州之行。

第一次一个人的旅行......

去过南方。94年去深圳，路过广州，07年春节也去过福建。但都是和家人亲戚一起去的。特别是福建那次, a big family, 十几个人, 呵呵！这一次真的是一个人的旅行了。到这个年纪，没有一个人出过远门，还真像个没有长大的孩子。上午9点左右，母亲送我到了站台，迟迟不肯离去，我知道她是非要等到火车开动才肯走的。一旁，一个中年男子笑着说：”你以后总是要一个人的，...”这简短的一句话，让我觉得有点尴尬。我挥手要母亲离去，但是她还是不走，好像想跟我说些什么。中年男子帮我拉开了火车的窗户，母亲嘱咐我到了记得打电话，在火车上多休息。还是等到火车开动了，才看到母亲离去的背影......

如果不晚点，火车晚上10点半可以到广州站。我是中铺，对面是中年男子。下铺这边是一个老奶奶，那边是一个年轻的大姐姐。中年男子是武汉人，好似在广州的一个超市里当个主管吧。大姐姐是黄冈的，在广州工作。老奶奶有个女儿在广州，去广州过冬，每年3，4月份才回来。武汉的冬天真的是很冷，南方还是适合养老啊！老奶奶气色很好，78岁了，祖籍上海，后来到了武汉工作生活，还是个医生呢！老奶奶话语不多，后来得知，老奶奶在吃饭前吃的药是治疗帕金森时，不禁一丝同情和感慨！奶奶说了一句，“恨不得一病就马上去死，......”不知道是对子女的一丝抱怨，还是不想拖累子女，我的心情很复杂。难道人到了中年有了孩子之后，赡养父母真的会觉得是包袱吗？久病床前无孝子？我不能理解。

火车还是晚点了，11点才到。奶奶的女儿来接了她，一个78岁的老人一人坐火车，这么远，感觉还是有些凄凉。大姐姐很好心，帮我指路到车站。广州有通宵的夜班车，3元，我感觉蛮便宜的，比白天只多一元。这样，我坐着夜班车到了学院站。表姐在车站等我，10分钟走到了她家，表姐夫和她公公都没有睡。我表达了歉意，这么晚去打扰他们。给母亲打了电话，快凌晨一点才睡。

第二天去踩点.......

考试的地点是广外，离我住的表姐家有五十多分钟车程。早上，表姐买了两个鸡蛋饼给我，味道真的很不错哦！居然还看到了卖热干面的，呵呵！从科韵路上车，发现广州的交通真的是很顺畅。走的广园快速路，一路高架桥。心想，什么时候武汉能发展成这样？到了广外，去了对面的陈田村问了问房子。来之前是计划在学校旁租房子的，因为有点远，还可以有个安静的环境复习，调整下心态。可以一问房子的价格奇贵，今天最便宜的是88元特价房一晚，明天就是138了。后来知道原因，原来我考试的那个星期天，正好是广州公务员考试。所以明天周六要涨价了。实在划不来，那天考试，早上就打的去吧。

中午去陈田村里吃了个盒饭，7元，两肉两荤两菜，真是爽啊！饭量也足，还有送的番茄汤。武汉可没有这么便宜的盒饭。下午回去后，去对面的职业学院自习看看书，晚上吃完饭，又出去看会了书。12点不到，就睡了。

第三天自习......

最后一天的复习时间了。说实话，根本也不指望复习什么内容，最重要的是调整好自己的心态。今天去职业学院，发现那里也是公务员考场，所以提前一天都封教室。没有办法，去草坪自习吧，可以晒晒太阳。冬天，广州的太阳很暖和，武汉却都是阴冷阴冷的。中午吃饭后，又出来，坐在草坪上，两个眼睛在打架。下午什么也没有看进去，就晃了晃，一直等到了吃饭时间才回去。表姐的孩子才两岁，由婆婆公公带着。下午他要睡觉，所以白天我也不便呆在他家里。说实话，考试前，没有什么心情看着两岁的孩子叫舅舅陪着玩。回想起来，翔翔真的是很讨人喜欢。有点像小时候的自己，有些瘦，说话细声像女孩子。他总喜欢笑，那天真无邪，纯真的笑。特别是听到我们赞美他，表扬他，他就笑地更开心了！

第四天考试......

早上7点出来，打算坐头一班车到广外，表姐送我到车站。可是，看到了大学城一路线来的时候，车已经装的太满了，以至于一个人都挤不上去。于是又等了一辆，又是这样。看来都是去考公务员的，我无法坐公汽了。表姐帮我叫了两个女孩子，一起拼车去广外。

广外的考场真是赞一个，宽敞，环境很好。最重要的是，我那个考场是今年新增的，没有多少人。回想上次在华工考时，小小的一个机房挤满了人，一个挨着一个，听听力时，耳边是其他考生说口语的嘈杂声。安静的环境，心情特别平静，阅读做到很好，听力也还可以。口语和作文都和上次差不多。后来的成绩也是如此。

下午，表姐来送我，买了肯德基给我当晚餐。现在才看清楚广州站的样子，感觉很破旧。对面的楼房，周围的面貌都有些破旧。很多人，据说金融危机很多人都失业返乡了。我们提前两个小时进了站。第二天早上回到武汉，父亲来接的我。

这次广州之行很难忘却。以至于到现在，都还记忆犹新。二十天后，出来了满意的托福成绩，也让我感到广州之行没有白费。广州城市面貌没有我想象的现代，甚至有点破旧。就算是我住的地方，天河软件园也不过如此，印象中还不如九四年去的深圳。不过，广州是座有历史的城市，广州的西关是我想去玩的地方。还有去广外路过的白云山，下次去一定都不能错过！

转载——给我的大洋彼岸的朋友们

2009-03-24T09:11:00.003-04:00

柯裕棻：独语

不过是几年前一个冬天的黄昏稍晚，当日黄昏短暂，匆匆下过小城那一年的第一场大雪。那是一座年年冰封五个月的小城，可是年年没有人确实做好心理准备，因此第一场雪总是措手不及，如此仓皇进入冬天已成惯例。

那个黄昏我必须走上一座斜坡旁听一堂关于尼采的课，我记得非常清楚当晚的主题是愤怒。我在松厚的新雪上赶路，薄暮中整排坡道的路灯突然亮起，直达斜坡之顶。四下无人无声，新降的雪色如同完美的和弦那样至情至性掩人耳目，使人不辨方位，如果没有这排金花也似的路灯，恐怕我当晚难以坚持意志走上那片斜坡。

我不记得那晚我们讲了尼采什么，我反而记得那个老师身着苔绿色的大毛衣，整个人绿茸茸仿佛刚刚步出春天的温室。那绿色的感觉如此奇特，以致于日后只要想起尼采的愤怒，我就直觉那样的愤怒一定是那样微妙的绿色。然而如果当天黄昏稍早我没有循着路灯坚持走上斜坡，那么稍晚那段关于愤怒之绿的莫名记忆将彻底从生命中错过。

这是一段无足轻重的小事，人生四处充满了如此难言的片段。下课后我走同样的斜坡回家，夜色又冷又沉压得雪成了冰，举步艰难。我行经稀疏的松树林，莫名其妙心生恐惧，我害怕人生如同暗夜行路，初始循着光亮往上前行，记取一些无法言喻的玄妙经验，然后再往下徐行，这光怪陆离的一切旋即抛在脑后，无法重来。

结果，因为当时的恐惧太过清晰，我将一切记得清清楚楚，几年之后那个黄昏成了我研究所生活最明确的隐喻。说穿了，就是学习行路以及独处。

二十几岁时人生的课题相当复杂，既要迅速累积也要适时放手。出国念博士像一场赌局，必须把在台湾的一切放下，拿自己坚持的理想和孤注一掷的青春跟人生对赌，要是成了，也许有个未来；要是失败了，到了三十岁仍一无所有。那几年里我不置可否地谈了几次不算深刻的恋爱，如今想起来，那些感情掺杂于垂云四布的学业主题之中显得微不足道、黯淡而且左支右绌，对于爱情以及它的能量和蕴藏我无心也无力深究，因为手中的筹码有限，而时间如沙子一般从指缝中溜走，从早到晚坐在桌边，书怎么念都念不完，我真怕空手而回。

研究生的日子一不小心就会过分简单，起床，早餐，读书，午餐，读书，晚餐，洗澡，读书，写论文，焦虑，睡觉，焦虑。间或穿插图书馆，超市，咖啡屋。除了上课之外，一个研究生完全不需要开口说话，没有课的时候，没有事就没有话。日子简单得像一条倾斜的线，往内心软弱的方向滑去。

出国念书的研究生岁月尤其孤独，周身的社会网络既不深刻也不固定，生活和心灵的锚完全系乎学业，别无所求。由于这种成败未卜的生活使人极度专心、焦虑和敏感，不论原来的个性如何，研究生很容易变得喜怒无常或者长期抑郁。长久以往，生命里其他的人便逐渐遭到驱逐，因为在一个满脑子只有抽像事物的人眼中看来，身边实质存在的个体都太过密实而无法超越，难以理解，毕竟，有页码的书比不透明的人容易多了，念书尚且来不及，哪儿有时间处理人呢。

那是一段奇异的岁月，独处是理所当然，恐惧又如影随形，人生之中重大的烦忧都是抽像的思考和缥缈的未来，如此活在浩邈学海里，只有一言难尽的忧郁，一切固实的事物都化于空中，虽然日子依旧持续春去秋来，可是因为从来没有明确的起点和结束，记忆中开始独处的那一天已经过去许久，未来总是尚未发生，人则是活在一点一点的片刻里，与过往熟悉的秩序脱节。人像是偏离轨道的小星体，不知不觉就独自走上了一条偏僻的路径，两旁的风景越来越陌生，诸事俱寂。这样走上一阵子，就再也没办法回头进入原有的秩序，再也不能习惯喧闹和群体。

最后，一种奇特的孤独会环绕着你，你从未如此深切感到自我的存在，因为他人都不再重要，你只剩下自己。

那个城里每年都会传说类似这样的事：冬天里，小城开始下雪后，每一栋建筑都开了暖气。有个研究生许多天没去上课，老师以为她退选，同学以为她休学。一个月过去没有人知道她的下落，也没有人在意。后来，某一栋学生公寓的学生抱怨，他们那层楼的温度特别低，可是某一户的窗子没关严。彻查之后发现，这位不去上学的研究生在她房里早就死了，因为窗子始终开着，气温非常低，她躺在床上一个月，结了霜，变成了浅蓝色。

有过只身留学经验的人大概能约略明白，这个传说的恐怖之处不在于死亡的状态，而在于这个传说之后隐含的既渺小又巨大的孤独。一个人脱离了所属的社会关系，在异乡又生不了根，身边也容不下任何人，房门一关，整个世界排拒在外。

其实这样的孤单过几年也就习惯了，其中自有一种爱弥丽迪更森（ Emily Dickinson）式的静美，习惯之后，骚动不安的灵魂能够从这种惟心的孤独中得到非比寻常的安歇。

然而一旦毕了业，学位拿到了，回到台湾，生命中多年悬挂的难关终于渡过，又立刻面临另一场动荡。这个生命历程的转变本质相当特殊而且唐突，在社会位置而言，是从边缘位置回到结构内部，从异文化的疏离回到熟悉的自文化，从无所是适进入生产行列，从一无所有变成“知识精英”。换句话说，几乎是一夕之间从穷学生变成教授，昨天还是个惴惴不安的研究生，今天突然成了高等教育的一份子。离开台湾时，还是个年轻的孩子，七年之间丝毫不觉得自己曾经沧海桑田，直到回到台湾才发现，七年原来是这样翻天覆地的长度，有这样一去不回的意义。

我仿佛是镜花缘里的人物，意外地游了龙宫，回到世上，打开宝盒，光阴的无限意涵在那一刻全部显现，在瞬间如电光一闪，荏苒百年。于是，一个人突然从理所当然单身的研究生转为莫名其妙单身的中产阶级。我还觉得单身生活真是再自然不过了，周边的眼光却不这样看我，我才恍然明白，社会位置换了，期待当然也换了，我才刚刚完成一个阶段任务，又得尽力符合社会的下一个要求。

刚开始教书的时候我才忽然体会原来这是一种含表演性质的职业，这个事实引起的莫大焦虑和沮丧更甚于研究所生涯。一个早上的课足以将人气力耗尽，下午声音哑得一句话也说不出来。我从一个冷凝的极端荡到另一个热烈的极端，两个极端之间的承续关系不大，背反的关系多些。

这种转变从外在环境上而言不太明显。人一直留在校园里，改变的冲击不至于难以承受。只是，留学的七八年里，我的人生经验是不断往内探求的过程，仿佛藉由知识将自己压缩成一个密度极大但是体积极小的黑洞；教书却是反向进行，教学伦理要求人像太阳一样发光放热，这个职业需要在短时间之内与大量的人互动，需要不停说话、沟通、解释、不厌其烦的表演、宽容并且随时充满热诚，同时必须具有将抽像的事物转化为简单语词的能力，种种的职业特性与研究生生涯恰恰相反，从前的生活可以任性地拒人于千里之外，教书却是从对人的基本热爱与关切开始，必须做到“幼吾幼以及人之幼”。

回国教书之后的某一个春天，寒假刚过，校园里的杜鹃明媚灿烂。早上八点钟我在办公室里收到一封分手的电子邮件，才想起我已经因为疲倦而和他渐行渐远。我想我应该痛哭一场或者立刻回信说点什么，或者，我也可以打越洋电话过去自我辩护或大吵一架。可是钟声响了，马上就得上课了，五十个学生正等着我告诉他们未来与希望。我感到胸口梗着一块东西难以吞咽，呼吸急促，窗外阳光刺眼，它的温暖非常嘲讽，它若是更亮一点我的眼泪就要掉了。

我去上了课，尽量做到妙语如珠，并且该讲的笑话都讲了，我想我看起来还是充满热诚以及宽容。几小时慢慢儿撑过去，我感到心子里有个密实的东西隐隐发热，也许是过去的自己正缓慢疼痛，一切都难以挽回，而且该做的事这样多，明明是黑洞却要装成太阳，我没有多余的气力再去关心另一个人。终于下课的时候，头疼欲裂，我在盥洗室的镜子里看见自己的脸，左颊一道粉笔灰像不在场的眼泪。我没在讲台上垮掉，我也没有回信或打电话，因为我累坏了，而且嗓子也哑了。

那天中午我在春阳曝晒中回家，鸟语花香，我极度疲累简直要融化在路边。有那么一刻，我宁愿回到雪地的黄昏里行路。

常常有人问我为什么选择单身，我想，如果情势使得每段感情都分手了结，一个人自然就单身了，非常简单.

Live-Blogging the Closing Ceremony

2008-08-24T21:35:00.051-04:00

By John Branch

Fireworks at the National Stadium near the end of the closing ceremony for the 2008 Beijing Olympic Games. (Reuters/Wolfgang Rattay)

John Branch was at the Bird’s Nest stadium in Beijing, sending live updates of the closing ceremony of the 2008 Olympics some 12 hours before NBC will telecast the ceremony on Sunday night. So Americans who wish to read what they missed earlier on Sunday can follow the festivities as they unfolded by clicking “read more” and reading up from the bottom of the post.

None of the Web sites Americans found on Aug. 8 that enabled them to watch live streams of the opening ceremony appeared to be operating today. However, China state broadcaster CCTV does have a Web page that presents photos and a synopsis of each phase of the closing ceremony.

BEIJING –

Beijing goes out with a bang. See you in 2012. (Reuters/Joe Chan)

1000am ET Here comes the big finish — or, as the media guide calls it, “the grandest carnival of mankind.” There are fireworks, dancers and memory tower acrobatics. The stage is filled with performers representing 56 ethnic groups singing, “Please Stay, Guests From Afar,” a song obviously intended to limit the craziness at the Beijing airport on Monday. Add hand-held confetti cannons and — bang! — the ceremony is over. Is that right? The Olympics ended with confetti cannons? As the athletes and the fans in the stands head for the exits, there is no rest for the hundreds of dancers around the perimeter. They are waving goodbye. Still waving, still waving, still waving…

The Olympic flame is finally extinguished. (Reuters/Dylan Martinez)

937am ET They are singing a song called, “Beijing, Beijing, I love Beijing,” to the tune of “New York, New York.” (O.K., it’s a different tune.) For those singing at home, here are our favorite lyrics: “The radiance of science and technology lights up the love.” The tower is emptying, with some of the performers zip-lining down wires from the top. And another song, this one called, “The Moon Is Bright Tonight.” It is a Chinese traditional folk song, being sung by seven women in long dresses. Tell your friends tonight that they are actually animatronic. They might believe you.

Ribbons flow skyward from the “memory tower.” (Reuters/Phil Noble)

933am ET The tower is like a cylindrical stage, the performers attached by wires. And here come the “lucky cloud yarns,” 16 of them to represent the 16 days of the Olympics. They aren’t actually yarn, but giant orange and yellow ribbons that cover the tower vertically and then get pulled skyward from their bottom edge, so that they point to the sky. It is supposed to be a“lucky cloud tree symbolizing friendship and joy." Then,“fireworks burst passionately.” Sure enough, passionate fireworks. Are there any other kind?
Wait a second — when did the flame go out?

The “memory tower,” clung to by 396 performers. (Reuters/Phil Noble)

922am ET Pictures of a Beijing 2008 airplane taxi around the upper rim of the stadium, which is like a 360-degree white screen for effects. Three athletes climb up a giant staircase (maybe Jimmy Page should have played “Stairway to Heaven”) as if to board a flight to London. The upper rim is now being used to play highlights, as the aforementioned “memory tower” ascends on the center stage. Two people in all white, like marble statues, are frozen on top, 23 meters high. And don't look now — actually, do — but 396 “memory tower performers” have climbed the side of the tower. This looks like it might be spectacular.

Beckham does what he does best, accompanied by a string quartet dressed in skimpy running togs. (EPA/Kay Nietfeld)

920am ET The biggest cheer of the ceremony goes through the crowd. IT’S DAVID BECKHAM!! AAAAH! He has a soccer ball and kicks it into the crowd on the field, where it hits a dancer in the back of the head

Leona Lewis and Jimmy Page. (AP/Greg Baker)

915am ET A red double-decker bus is circling the field as part of the “handover performance,” during which the Games are symbolically transferred from Beijing in 2008 to London in 2012. But this is no ordinary bus. The top is peeling back to reveal … uh … let us refer to the media guide. Oh, here come some performers. There’s Led Zeppelin’s Jimmy Page on the guitar playing “Whole Lotta Love.” But the woman singing is definitely not Robert Plant. It’s Leona Lewis.

A Dr. Seuss-like contraption symbolizing, what — rhythm? sportsmanship? Whoville? enters the stadium. (EPA/Nic Bothma)

The London bus at the Bird’s Nest. (Clive Rose/Getty Images)
903am ET The Olympic flag is being lowered slowly by the Guard of Honor. A chorus of 226 children, Chinese and foreign, is singing the Olympic Hymn. Come on, everyone! “Ancient immortal spirit, pure father of beauty, of greatness and of truth. Descend, reveal yourself as lightning here within the glory of your own earth and sky…” Actually, they sing it in Greek. And the best line, translated to English, is this: “At running and wrestling and at throwing, illuminate in the noble Games’ momentum, and crown with the unfading branch and make the body worthy and iron-like.” Wait. That doesn’t even rhyme. Maybe it does in Greek.

I.O.C. president Jacques Rogge, left, and Chinese president Hu Jintao. (AP/David J. Phillip)

858am ET International Olympic Committee President Jacques Rogge is talking, and no one can hear what he is saying in English. We’ve finally figured out the one flaw to the magnificent Bird’s Nest — it has poor acoustics for speakers. But Rogge’s words appear on one big screen in Chinese, and everyone seems really happy. And on the other big screen, the translation is in French. We’re no linguists, but we’re pretty sure the word exceptionnelle means“exceptional.”

Performers suspended in midair, perhaps representing an enraptured box lacrosse team, at the closing ceremony. (Reuters/Alfred Cheng Jin)

Marathon winner Samuel Wanjiru of Kenya after receiving his gold medal at the closing ceremony. (AP/David Phillip)

844am ET The final medal ceremony of the Olympics — alas, not for the zany pants, but for the men’s marathon. How great is that? Most medal ceremonies occur in one of the far-flung venues in front of a few thousand fans generally waiting to go home. But there is a bit of indignity for men’s marathon winner Samuel Wanjiru of Kenya. His name was spelled incorrectly, or at least differently than usual, on the big screen and on the television broadcast: Wansiru. Still, he was feted in front of a packed and attentive stadium, including all the other athletes, and however many millions of viewers around the world, with the medal presentation, the national anthem and the raising of the Kenyan flag. It does not get bigger than that. How many of the roughly 11,000 athletes were in attendance when Michael Phelps received one of his golds?

Two “heavenly drums” float above the stadium floor as some kind of human bongo cart rolls beneath. (EPA/Marcus Brandt)

Actual fireworks over the Bird’s Nest, not a digital representation. (Reuters/Christina Hu)

834am ET The flag bearers from each country enter the stadium in a pack. Unlike the Opening Ceremony, where each country is announced and the entire delegation enters, the flag bearers congregate in the middle, and athletes file in somewhat haphazardly. If nothing else, it’s a time saver, scheduled to take about 15 minutes. Canada received the gold medal in the zany-pants competition. A wave — called the “Mexican wave” in China as it is throughout most of the world, and still a relatively new phenomenon here — begins to circle the upper deck of the stadium. And the poor dancers charged with bouncing and waving colorful flags are showing signs of fatigue.

The Canadians and their zany pants. (Shaun Botterill/Getty Images)

815am ET Among the hundreds of performers on the field during the “Reunion, Greeting the Guests” (whatever happened to a simple: “Welcome. Can we take your coat?”) were 60 “light wheels.” They are more than six feet in diameter and have a web of light surrounding a person riding it, like a unicycle. One guy just wiped out. Doubt he’ll ever work a Closing Ceremony again.

A “light wheel” makes its entrance. (Jeff Gross/Getty Images)

Fireworks during the closing ceremony.(EPA/Michael Reynolds)

805am ET It was hard to tell if there were more fireworks in the sky or more flash bulbs popping in the stands when the ceremony began. The Chinese national anthem was sung, and China President Hu Jintao was introduced on the large screen. He has to be a happy man — these Olympics went as smoothly as anyone dared to imagine they would. China not only won the gold-medal count, with a record 51, but also pulled off what had to be the most efficiently run Games in history. And now there is drumming. And men hanging from giant drums over the field. And fireworks. And hundreds of lit-up dancers shaking rattles on their bodies. Oh, the percussion…

At the closing ceremony in Beijing. (Clive Rose/Getty Images)

PRE-CEREMONY SCENE-SETTER People are filing into the 91,000-seat National Stadium, better known as the Bird’s Nest. To pass the time, organizers brought some chaos to the field in the form of dancers, bicyclists, plate spinners and acrobats. Now the audience is practicing how to cheer and wave the colorful fans each spectator was given. It’s kind of like the warm-up act to the Closing Ceremony.
Until the real thing begins, let’s toss out some fun facts about what we’re about to see, thanks to the handy, 54-page “Closing Ceremony Media Guide.” (Yes, there is such a thing, which is how everyone reporting on the event will sound so well-informed when talking about the meaning of the “lucky cloud yarn strips” that will rise along the “memory tower.” Don’t get excited; we’re not going to spoil the secret just yet.)
There will be 4,010 costumes in 18 styles.
The creative team had 232 members. Nine of them were not Chinese.
Rehearsals began in September 2007.
And our favorite: Nineteen composers created 30 hours of music for the Closing Ceremony. (And you thought the Opening Ceremony was long.)
Stay tuned for when the real ceremony begins…
Fireworks over Tiananmen Square to mark the closing of the Olympics. (REUTERS/Carlos Barria)

Olympics Close With a Bang and a Double-Decker Bus

2008-08-24T20:59:00.010-04:00

By DAVID BARBOZA
Published: August 24, 2008

BEIJING — With another dramatic fireworks display Sunday evening at the National Stadium here, the Beijing Olympics came to a dazzling close, ending two weeks of spectacular athletic performances during an Olympic competition that was surprisingly free of protests or the disruptions that some, including Beijing, had anticipated.

In addition to fireworks, there were acrobats clinging to a large “memory tower” at the center of the stadium, also known as the Bird’s Nest, precision drummers, bicyclists and performers representing 56 ethnic groups singing, “Please Stay, Guests From Afar.”

And unlike in the opening ceremony, with its orderly parade of countries and their athletes, the closing ceremony brought flag bearers congregating in the middle, and athletes filing in somewhat haphazardly and many dressed less formally.

In the handover ceremony for the 2012 London Games, a red double-decker bus entered the stadium just after 9 p.m., followed by three cyclists. The bus then opened into a stage with Jimmy Page, the Led Zeppelin guitarist, perfoming “Whole Lotta Love” with the British singer Leona Lewis, and David Beckham, the soccer star, taking a soccer ball from a young Chinese girl, handing the games off to London.

Beijing had staked everything on the Games, galvanizing the nation, spending billions to rebuild the ancient capital, erecting fantastic stadiums and producing the kind of opening and closing ceremonies that can only be created in China, with tens of thousands of performers dazzling a global television audience the vibrant displays of color and mass synchronization.

Leading up to the closing ceremony, the United States basketball team, the self-named “Redeem Team,” defeated Spain to recapture the gold medal. The American men’s volleyball team, disoriented after the head coach’s father-in-law had been murdered while touring Beijing, also captured a gold medal, defeating a powerful Brazilian team. A Kenyan runner won the men’s marathon, and a Cuban tae kwon do athlete was banned for kicking a referee.

The 29th Olympiad was supposed to be China’s coming out party, a show of its rising economic and political power and its reemergence as a global power. And in many ways it was. But the Games also turned into a dramatic show of this country’s athletic power, with China hauling in 51 gold medals, enough to top the gold medal tables and unseat the United States, which won 36.

The United States led the overall medal count with 110 medals to China’s 100. But rarely has a country won more than 50 gold medals. The last time was 1988, during the Seoul Olympics, when the former Soviet Union won 55. About 38 world records were set.

With Chinese fans chanting “Zhongguo Jiayou!” or “Go China!,” and hundreds of millions of people tuning in everyday by television, some of the biggest audiences in television history, the games served to strengthen pride in the country at a time of rising nationalism.

Liu Xiang, this country’shurdling champion, was injured and unable to defend his title in the 110-meter hurdles, but China dominated in diving, gymnastics weightlifting, shooting and a host of other sports.

There were stories of incredible athletic accomplishments: American swimmer Michael Phelps winning a record eight gold medals and the Jamaican sprinter Usain Bolt being crowned the world’s fastest man.

India, a country of one billion, won its first gold medal in an individual event. And Togo, a West African nation of 6 million people, won its very first Olympic medal, a bronze in the kayak.

Grave concerns about pollution and athletes donning masks disappeared after the fifth day, after heavy rains cleansed the skies and sun broke through for the opening of the track and field events. Whether China’s weather tamperers really seeded clouds and created rains that were perfectly timed to clear up the weather is still unclear.

But Beijing did take draconian measures to ensure a successful Olympics, limiting cars on the roads, forcing the closure and removal of factories from around Beijing, and essentially ordered large parts of the nation to do everything possible to make these games a success.

Some political analysts say Beijing placed too much importance on the Games, and others said the country failed to live up to its promises to open up and undertake political changes that would improve the country’s human rights record. But this afternoon, Jacques Rogge, the president of the International Olympics Committee, which awarded the games to Beijing in 2001, said: “The world has learned about China, and China has learned about the world, and I believe this is something that will have positive effects for the long term.”

John Branch contributed reporting from Beijing.

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/08/25/sports/olympics/25beijing.html?hp

Past Two Months...

2008-06-20T06:04:00.002-04:00

Time likes a shuttle, with which she is flying. Such feeling strongly penetrated my life, especially in the past two months. Make myself busy, and busyness will drive the monotonousness and loneliness away. The only content every day was to review the vocabulary and read the anomalous essays, which was nearly unfamiliar within your own knowledge scope and educational background. Fortunately, I got over it finally, in spite of the results was beyond a distance away from my expectation. Anyhow, I gained a lot, I told myself as a consolation and relief. Indeed, I gained a lot, which enriched and broadened my horizon and scope, opening a new door by another language. Now being persistent on using them is the next step I shall do.

Remember that in the movie The Beach, Leonardo DiCaprio said:" just keep your mind open and suck in the experience, and if it hurts, it's probably worth it." I really like it. The past two months is a good experience for me, feeling a little hurt and busy, so it is worthy. Moreover, I consider that if you are young, learn more and experience more, grasping the precious time. In my opinion, the old saying "it is never too old to learn", serves as excuse for the indolent and waiting person. From my sister's personal experience, who is in her thirty, now feels her energy and time fails to suffice the need for consecutive learning after she made great effort to become a CFA charterholder. So, grasp the time of every day!

Although time is flying, time can stop in our memory of the catastrophe, WenChuan earthquake in 12th, May. I clearly remember that day afternoon: I was on the bus to HanKou, and because of the bus was wobbling, I hardly feel the earthquake, but surprisingly seeing throngs of people gathered along the street, especially a huge crowd in front of Hubei General Hospital. Bus ran across the Yangtze River Bridge and arrived the Hankou ZhongShan Park, the street teemed with thousands of people along the Wuhan Plaza and World Trade Plaza, looking up the two 200 meters building, as if a turmoil. I got down and asked the people, then knowing that earthquake happened somewhere.

ChenJian, the 26 year old man who had being trapped under the rubble for nearly eighty hours, finally passed away quietly and peacefully on the way to hospital after seven hours' effort to set him free. This was a so heart-rending story, for we experienced a fortunate survivor in this disaster died at last, turning our hope into the valley of anguish. His last words still lingers in my brain:" I am a lucky as well as unlucky person in the Wenchuan earthquake. I felt that I escaped from the hands of Death. Many others are less fortunate.... I must be strong. I have to be strong. I have to be strong for everyone who loves me. I must live for their sakes, because they have been so good to me. I hope that you can be just like me and not be intimidated by any hardship...." Actually, when people were facing with such natural disaster, life is so fragile. It is natural that people feel horror, dread. For the behaviors like teachers escaping regardless of the children behind, are no doubt to be condemned and criticized in the boundaries of moral sense. Yet, Life is precious, cherish our lives.

2008-05-26T11:32:00.002-04:00

Remarks by Special Envoy for China and the Strategic Economic Dialogue on US China economic relationsSource: US Federal GovernmentPublished Thursday, 22 May, 2008 - 15:06
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Thank you President Liu and Vice President Zhou for your invitation and for your hospitality. It is a privilege and honor to be with you today at Wuhan University.

Before I begin, I want to extend my condolences to those injured and to the families of the victims of the earthquake in Sichuan Province. I am particularly saddened by the number of students and children affected by this tragedy. The thoughts and prayers of the American people are with the Chinese people at this time, especially those directly affected. Both the American people and the United States government have provided assistance and remain ready to help in any way possible.

I would also like to recognize Wendy Lyle, United States Consul General for the newly established U.S. Consulate General here in Wuhan. We are proud to have this official presence in Wuhan and believe it will strengthen the U.S.-China relationship in the years and decades to come.

When I became Special Envoy for China and the Strategic Economic Dialogue in February of 2007, Vice Premier Wu Yi, a native of your great city, encouraged me to visit the parts of China beyond Beijing and Shanghai. I have happily followed her advice. In the past 15 months, I have been privileged to visit Shenyang, Qinghai, Xi'an, Chengdu, Guangzhou, Shenzhen, Hong Kong, and Ningbo (just yesterday). My trips have included visits to rural villages to see both the opportunities and the challenges you face in promoting balanced, harmonious growth.

I've learned that China is a country of contrasts as it develops rapidly: contrasts between eastern, central and western regions; urban and rural areas; contrasts between one province and another. There are also large contrasts within provinces, and your province Hubei is no exception.

Hubei Province and Wuhan

I have been impressed by Wuhan's strategic geographic location in China and your strong traditions of trade and intellectual advancement that date back to the Han Dynasty. I learned that nearly 2,000 years ago one of the critical battles of the Romance of the Three Kingdoms occurred right here in this area. You are both an ancient and a modern city, a city rooted in tradition but at the heart of an economically rising central China.

An increasing amount of China's – and the world's – economy passes through Wuhan. Your city is a transport nexus for central China, located where the mighty Han and Yangtze Rivers meet, and is critically important for shipping, rail, and highways – as Wuhan sits at the crossroads of one of China's main North-to-South and East-to-West national highways.

I applaud your country's and your province's initiative to promote the rise of Central China. Vice Premier Wang Qishan's speech here in Wuhan less than one month ago was impressive, as he encouraged your region to speed reform and opening. Your efforts to promote the development of Central China through increased trade and investment are significant and worthwhile.

I am here today, in part, to tell you that my colleagues and I in the United States government believe that closer U.S.-China economic cooperation benefits the development of all regions of China and the United States, not just our political and economic centers. Broad-based, high-quality economic growth that benefits the people of our countries is of utmost importance to all of us.

U.S.-China Economic Relations: A Paradox of Optimism and Apprehension
As part of my responsibilities, I also travel widely throughout the United States and meet with business, economic, and academic groups, along with government leaders at all levels. I explain the consequential nature and positive impact of our economic relationship, and the importance of the U.S.-China Strategic Economic Dialogue.

We have a deep reservoir of good will between the people of our two countries. And yet while our growing economic interdependence was once a source of stability in our bilateral relations, it is now increasingly also a source of tension, in both of our countries.

A 2008 survey that simultaneously conducted public polling both here in China and in the United States characterized these mutual perceptions between our countries' two peoples as a "paradox of hope and fear." This survey, published by an influential group of Chinese Americans called the Committee of 100, shows that, on the one hand, a majority of citizens in the United States and China generally hold positive views of each other and broadly recognize the importance of U.S.-China relations and our increasing economic interdependence. On the other hand, a strong majority of Americans view China's growing economic and military power as a serious or potential threat, and nearly half of the Chinese feel that the United States is trying to prevent their country from becoming a great world power.

Both sides recognize that our most common interests lie in trade. Among Americans, trade is regarded as the most likely area of shared interests, yet it also ranks as the most likely source of conflict. There it is again, a mix of hope and fear. These concerns are straining the domestic consensus in both the United States and China on the benefits of economic engagement, leading to the rise of economic nationalism and isolationism among some sectors in both our nations. These sentiments may constrain leaders from adopting policies that are in the long-term interests of the citizens and economies of your country and mine.

Recognizing that this paradox of optimism and apprehension is real, I have come to Wuhan to speak with you about a reality that is central to the well-being of the people of our two great nations: that is, free trade and investment between our two countries are in our fundamental mutual interests. One only needs to consider how far our relationship has developed since we normalized relations nearly thirty years ago to appreciate the rapid growth of our mutual benefit.

I will also describe three essential steps we must take together as we look to the future that will sustain and enhance our mutual, growing economic prosperity.

China and the United States: Beneficiaries of Free Trade, Open Markets, and Foreign Direct Investment

I have been deeply involved with international economic issues for over 25 years. One of the clearest lessons I have learned is that those countries that open themselves to competition, reform their economies, and welcome foreign investment benefit their citizens greatly. Direct investment in another country, such as manufacturing plants or service companies, is the ultimate vote of confidence in that country's economy.

Such openness is the most reliable path to economic growth and reduction of poverty: it provides better jobs and opportunities, improved living standards, greater consumer choice and lower prices and inflation. Openness is not a zero-sum game; it enhances efficiency, productivity, and competitiveness.

Benefits for China

China's reform and opening over the past three decades have arguably produced the most dramatic economic transformation in world history. China has transformed itself from a poor, mostly agrarian, and almost completely closed economy, into an integral driver of the global economy. In the process, China has achieved economic growth of nearly 10 percent per year that has lifted hundreds of millions of Chinese citizens out of poverty. In 2007, China became the world's second-largest exporter, and its trade volume for the first time exceeded the combined trade of Japan and South Korea. Free trade and foreign direct investment have been central to China's extraordinary economic achievements.

While China has benefited greatly from inward investment over the past three decades, it is now becoming a large supplier of capital to other nations as well. According to China's Ministry of Commerce, China's total overseas investment in 2007 was over $18 billion. Chinese investors visit the United States with increasing regularity to consider foreign investments; we welcome their investments and their confidence in the American economy.

Benefits for the United States

U.S. exports to the world now account for 12 percent of our GDP, the highest level in our history. Exports supplied more than 40 percent of U.S. economic growth in 2007. In the United States, the Peterson Institute for International Economics estimates that the integration of the global economy generates an economic gain of $1 trillion to the U.S. economy every year.

With respect to China specifically, China is now the United States' third largest export market, with our exports including goods ranging from aircraft, to soybeans to electrical machinery. In the past decade, our exports to China have increased six times faster than our exports to the rest of the world. A recent study by the U.S.-China Business Council found that over 90 percent of U.S. congressional districts had triple-digit export growth to China in the past 8 years.

In a speech in Shanghai two weeks ago, my colleague David McCormick, Treasury Undersecretary for International Affairs, noted that foreign direct investment flows into the United States were $204 billion in 2007, nearly double the level of a decade earlier. Foreign-owned firms in the United States directly employ over 5 million Americans – 4.5 percent of all private sector employment. These are good jobs with good wages, paying more than 25 percent higher compensation on average than other private sector jobs. Foreign-owned firms contribute almost six percent of U.S. output, 14 percent of U.S. R&D spending, and 19 percent of U.S. exports.

Yet the Consensus for Open Economies is Eroding

Despite these compelling facts, the longstanding consensus in support of open economies shows signs of eroding, in both our countries.

Any dynamic economy that is constantly creating new, higher-value jobs inevitably faces factory closings and job losses that are real and painful. The benefits of free trade are often spread across an entire country, while the lost jobs are more focused and immediately visible. But succumbing to the temptation to make trade and foreign investment a scapegoat only breeds support for isolationist policies that will make us worse off, reducing the losses of the present by sacrificing the job opportunities and higher standards of living of the future.

Some Specific Concerns

With respect to investment, we often hear concerns from China about the U.S. investment review process and whether the United States truly welcomes Chinese investment. U.S. legal authority in this area is narrowly targeted to address acquisitions that raise genuine national security concerns, not broader economic interests or industrial policy factors. Last year, for instance, less than 10 percent of all foreign direct investments were reviewed by the Committee on Foreign Investment in the United States (CFIUS), and the vast majority of those were resolved without controversy, including those by state-owned enterprises.

Last month, the Treasury Department issued proposed regulations on investment to clarify and improve our existing review process, reinforce strong open investment principles and procedural protections for foreign investors, and ensure a more timely and efficient review process. We welcome your comment on these proposed regulations.

The United States is strongly committed to maintaining an open investment climate, including for investments from China.
In addition, Chinese officials have expressed frustration that the United States has filed cases in the World Trade Organization (WTO) against Chinese practices. But we should not regard such actions as a failure of our bilateral economic relationship. Rather, the WTO provides neutral, legal mechanisms to address issues that cannot be resolved through negotiation. As U.S. Trade Representative Susan Schwab has said, "WTO dispute settlement is designed to prevent trade wars rather than fuel them."

From American companies investing in China, we often hear concerns that China's interest in foreign investment is no longer as robust as before, that foreign investment regulations are opaque and seem to be designed to favor Chinese "national champions." These concerns include implementation of the new Anti-Monopoly Law; protection of specific Chinese competitors rather than competition in general; technical standards that appear to be discriminatory; treatment of foreign firms more harshly than Chinese firms; and other steps inconsistent with China's impressive move toward market-based economic principles.

The Role of the SED

Fortunately, the Strategic Economic Dialogue provides a forum and a mechanism to address these and other issues. At our most recent Cabinet-level meeting in December 2007, the United States and China agreed to create a high-level exchange on investment and to intensify ongoing discussions about a Bilateral Investment Treaty to provide meaningful investor protections.

Each twice-yearly, Cabinet-level SED meeting presents multiple opportunities to share perspectives and clarify misunderstandings. We can never do too much communicating.

The "Three Essentials": Keys to the Future of U.S.-China Economic Cooperation

I have been privileged to support and participate in our semi-annual discussions between the economic leaders of our two countries, led on the U.S. side by Secretary of the Treasury Henry Paulson and on the Chinese side by Vice Premier Wang Qishan (formerly by Vice Premier Wu Yi). Through the SED, we are strengthening the foundations of the U.S.-China economic relationship, and we are pursuing solutions to the big, strategic economic issues that face our two countries.

As we do so, there are essential behaviors we must strengthen if we are to continue to enhance our economic strength and mutual interests. I will name three.

Essential Number One: Keep Relationship on an Even Keel

When President Bush and President Hu Jintao established the SED in 2006, they envisioned a forum and a mechanism to allow both governments to communicate at the highest levels and with one voice on issues of critical, long-term importance to ensure bilateral economic stability and prosperity. And that's what direct engagement does: it keeps the relationship on an even keel by lessening miscommunication and dispelling misperceptions so common in the history of the U.S.-China relationship.

This kind of enhanced dialogue and engagement means we must confront problems frankly and honestly – and often rapidly. One example is product safety.In the spring of 2007, many Americans were alarmed about a wave of reports of unsafe food and product imports from China. The credibility of the "China brand" in the United States was at risk. Fortunately, at the Cabinet-level SED meetings in May, 2007, our governments were able to begin intensive work together to address this problem. And at the SED meetings in December 2007, we achieved two landmark agreements on food, feed, drugs, and medical devices.

While there have been bumps along the way, those agreements and related interactions have fostered a culture of collaboration. But this is just the beginning. These issues are deep-seated, complicated, and will not be resolved immediately; this is why we need to continue to work together to build science-based quality into each stage of the manufacturing process. Our efforts will be further enhanced by progress on other related and fundamental issues, such as rule of law, transparency, and intellectual property protection.

In fact, the effectiveness with which the Chinese government continues to manage these safety issues will have long-term implications for U.S.-China trade relations, the integration of China into the global trading system, and the sustainability of China's economic growth trajectory.

(2) Essential Number Two: Address Forward-Looking, Strategic Areas of Critical Mutual Interest

Looking to the future of our relationship, we cannot afford to succumb to the problem of "short-termism" where we primarily consider the issues just in front of our eyes. We also need visionary leaders, supported by understanding citizens, who look out at the horizon, identify the transformational issues of our times, and address them now with policies and actions that will help us realize a sustainable and even more prosperous future in the next generation and beyond. Through the SED mechanism, the leaders of our two countries work diligently to identify and address those critical issues – including the need to address our respective macroeconomic imbalances, financial sector liberalization and currency reform, innovation and intellectual property rights, investment, transportation, rule of law, and transparency, among other issues.
One example I would like to elaborate upon is our joint work on energy security and environmental cooperation. The United States and China are shaping, and being shaped by, global energy and environmental trends that have strong economic consequences. Our countries are the world's largest energy consumers and the largest emitters of greenhouse gases.

We share the challenge of achieving balanced economic growth along with energy security and environmental sustainability. It will take resourcefulness, creativity, determination and a long-term commitment to achieve the results we seek.

At last December's SED meeting, the United States and China announced a ten-year cooperative effort on energy and environmental issues. Our ten-year energy and environment cooperative framework is part of that commitment. We will focus on shared objectives, including energy security, lower greenhouse gas emissions, clean water, clean air, clean and efficient transportation, and the preservation of wild and beautiful places.

This effort will challenge our governments, industries, universities, research institutions, thought leaders, and non-governmental organizations to find answers to these and many other questions: How do we reduce dependency on oil and increase energy security? How do we better preserve the natural environment and prevent greenhouse gas release due to deforestation? How do we meet our energy goals? How do we ensure that our water is clean and safe?

These questions may be answered differently in the United States than in China. Yet our approaches to finding answers may be similar – to implement proven, effective policies, to educate individuals to make environmentally sound decisions, to ensure that companies follow regulations designed to protect human health. Other solutions will require technological breakthroughs and making existing or new technology affordable by reducing market access barriers.

Since December, we have been hard at work developing action plans for joint projects that will build upon and accelerate existing efforts. We are placing a priority on shared goals, such as reducing dependency on oil. We are defining specific energy targets, such as increasing vehicle fleet fuel efficiency and creating incentives for the development and use of alternative fuels. We want to build clean and efficient transportation systems and protect the wetlands and forests of our two countries. These action plans will help each country identify policy solutions to improve implementation of existing regulations and incentives, and challenge us to develop even more innovative approaches and answers.

(3) Essential Number Three: Develop a Culture of Collaboration and Trust

The U.S.-China economic relationship is complex and managing complexity is daunting. It begins with speaking to the right people, at the right time, on the right issues, and in the right way. The Strategic Economic Dialogue – as a new and leading institution in U.S.-China relations – has created these useful channels among policymakers in Washington and Beijing. Our approach engages multiple and diverse government officials in both countries to facilitate more inclusive interactions. It breaks down classic bureaucratic stove-pipes that hinder effective communication and impede results.

And, as important as any contribution, it helps develop and expand trust between leaders. Trust among leaders is a strategic asset in any economic relationship. Views are respected, ideas are shared candidly, and mutual interests are pursued.

Just as there have been challenges along the way since normalization of U.S.-China relations in 1979, there will undoubtedly be challenges in the decades to come. Eliminating challenge is not the primary goal – that would be impossible – rather, the goal is to create deeper foundations of trust and communication to better manage those challenges.

The deepening of trust and communication is not solely the role of government leaders. It is also the responsibility of businesspersons, workers, farmers, professors, students, and others. And in August, thousands of athletes from over 100 countries, including athletes from the United States and China, will have the opportunity to deepen communication and trust when they participate in the 2008 Beijing Olympics.

Information about each other, accessible through the internet, is exploding. But there is an understanding deficit. We do not know each other as well as we should. The best way to close this understanding gap is through strengthening the exchange of people and our interaction. That's another major benefit of a U.S. Consulate General now here in Wuhan.

We will also advance our understanding and communication because of the new U.S.-China Tourism Agreement and Civil Aviation Agreement, signed at the SED meetings in May and December, 2007. New nonstop flights between Atlanta and Shanghai, San Francisco and Guangzhou, Philadelphia and Beijing, and the other flights that follow, will strengthen the bonds between us.

These interactions provide the opportunity for Americans to underscore that we welcome the rise of a confident, peaceful and prosperous China. A weak and insecure China is not in America's economic or security interests.
Conclusion

One of the most important economic questions of this century is whether we get the economic relationship between our two countries "right." That means stable, growing, mutually beneficial, and supportive bilateral relations. If you question that statement, consider two different visions of the future of the U.S.-China relationship.

The first is a vision that is dark and problematic. It's a future of a superpower and a rising power on a collision course, increasingly suspicious of the other's intentions, scrambling in a zero-sum competition for resources and influence -- oblivious to the possibilities for cooperation that serve our mutual interest. It's a future in which we see each other through caricatures. This future portends a fragile relationship, which is cracked easily by unavoidable misunderstanding and accident.

The second vision is one in which our ability to work together matches the degree to which our economies are already so deeply integrated. In this future, I see the leaders in each nation communicating well, growing in their trust for one another, working through misunderstandings and crises, and expanding -- where possible -- common interests, while recognizing distinct national goals. In this vision, I also see people in each nation that recognize our commonalities -- that we mutually benefit from trade, investment, and all forms of communication and exchange.

It's this second vision that we are promoting through the Strategic Economic Dialogue. It's a vision that I hope you share, of a strong and lasting relationship we will continue to develop, expand, and help flourish.

A letter sent after sister Long's leaving for Florida

2008-05-17T22:59:00.002-04:00

May 13th, 2008

Dear sister Long:

Now, you and Ming are on the plane to Atlanta. I phoned aunt this evening, to know that everything went smoothly, and wish you a good journey!

Time likes a shuttle, with which she is flying. Now you are leaving, I am much obliged to you and Ming for your sincere help, advice and encouragement for me. Now I start to miss you for the good times we spent in aunt's house, my parents' house and at the square of railway station. I will never forget the words "tart", the time you helped me to revise my resume and check my gre vocabulary. And also "soggy, perfunctory (characterized by routine and superficiality; lacking in interest and enthusiasm, you are right!), turbulence, torpid..." we discussed at the square and walked around the plaza for taking exercise.

Time likes a knife, with which she is carving her image. However, I feel you are hardly carved by time, rather, the same as ten years before, caring for others and take seriously and sincerely to others. Making sure everyone sits down with chair when dinner and correcting my pronunciation for "contents, must, prepare, idea, share", you take a piece of paper to write down them for me, making me feel touched. Moreover, when you worried about Ming's leaving alone with ponderous luggage for his hometown at the station, your eyes teemed with anxieties for a long time. Please forgive me for venturing to say that and my sensitivities, rather, it is just my true feeling without any reservation when writing here. You really set a good example for me, for being sincere to others and caring for others, yet, do not forget to care more about yourself, relax and entertain yourself, being happy all the time!

You repeatedly told me that grasping the time to learn more when you are young, and after marriage and having children, your state of mind will be distracted and energy can not be concentrated wholly. I will keep in mind with your encouragement and make great effort to learn. Also, I wish you all the best, enjoying family love and joy with children. We all bless you and the God.

At last, thanks very much for Ming that he directed me to revise my resume meticulously with the detail about using the more appropriate words and expressions. Yes, It is fortunate for me to have the face-to-face opportunity to talk with Ming and you about information and matters needs attention relating to application. By the way, last night, when I return home, the revised document of resume in my flash disk fail to open the latest version, maybe some mistakes happened when saving from Ming's laptop, I should have opened it to make sure the latest content. Moreover, the copy of my resume was bound to be on the desktop of Ming's laptop unless he deleted or moved it, if so, could you send to me a copy via email? If he does not have the copy, it does not matter, for I could remember most of the revised details last night after home, and I just want to check whether there is any points I am oblivious of.

Best wishes!
yours Yi

The study of history should be concentrated on the famous few or the groups of people behind?

2008-03-25T05:35:00.003-04:00

Open any history books, no matter textbooks for school children or masterpiece written by history scholars, the famous few are shining like stars in the sky, occupying all the people's attention. Therefore, someone asserts that, the study of history places too much emphasis on the individuals, and groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten are the history creators. However, I disagree with this claim, as discussed below.

In the first place, the famous few are the key impetus in the occurrence and development of history events, for their wisdom and sagacity for the right decision and strategy play a crucial and pivotal role. For example, Chairman Mao, the famous statesman, strategist, thinker and revolutionist, leading us to the liberation of China is strong evidence in my point of view. During the revolution process, Autumn Harvest Uprising is a crucial battle and a watershed in the history. Moreover, to make a thorough consideration, we can go not very far to discover that, it is Mao's wisdom as a great thinker that realize the importance of working-class and peasantry, and it is Mao's sagacity as a strategist that plan and layout the route for uprising, success can achieve.

Besides, when it comes to the history of famous discovery in technology and science, it is indubitable and undeniable that the famous few' s contribution play the pivotal role, and the works related done by groups of others is of unnecessary to draw our attention in the study of history. For instance, Isaac Newton, world renowned scientists, who discovered the gravity, propounding Three Laws of Motion, his personal contribution to the field physics is highly praised by the whole world. What is more, Darwin, who revolutionized the biology by theory of Evolution, based on natural selection, it is him, his wisdom, assiduous characteristics and talents that make this great discovery happen, bringing the benefit to us descendants.

In the second place, granted that the groups of people do a certain contribution in the significant events, to some extent, but only play the roles as upholders and followers who support and advocate the famous few. Take the example of Chairman Mao, as discussed before. In order to study of history of China's liberation, Mao is no doubt the key person, but how about the group of others' contribution? They are the role of the upholders and supporters. Premier Zhou Enlai, Deng Xiaopin, Peng Dehuai, besides the generals and military commanders, even soldiers and workers, etc, all make their own contribution to this profound revolution in long history of China. However, these people, what methodology shall be used to study in history? Grasping and pay attention to the key leader and search for the related group of others is the efficient way. On the contrary, is it studying the group of others unrelated unnecessary and nonsense? Even to say a waste of time.

In the third place, it is pragmatic and reasonable for us the study the history by placing the mainly emphasis on individuals. Two reasons may contribute to my claim. Firstly, considering the textbooks in school teaching, the main contents of them is linked by a few famous few people and elites. What's more, the famous masterpiece, such as The Book of History, written by Si MaQian, in Western Han Dynasty also records the famous few as content. Given that the books are, to some degree, the reflection the feudalism will of governing class, but except for the famous few, the groups of others, whose contribution and characteristics are too unclear to recording, how can it be written in the books for us to study? Secondly, studying the famous few can show us some examples of the famous few, as the people in our real society, their deeds, strategy, wisdom can be learned by ourselves, acting as the motive and active role for us ordinary people. By studying them, not only making sense for our mundane society, but also erecting examples in the revolution and development for our next generation.

To sum up, studying the famous few is the most efficient and pragmatic way to history research. The group of others can not be of negligence and oblivion, for it is acting as propellants of the history's wheel, besides, the famous few, as the rudder who lead us to the bright future.

Money spent on research is almost always a good investment?

2008-03-20T10:45:00.000-04:00

The significant and profound achievement in scientific world is attributed to the scientific research which needs money as financial aid and support of government and universities. However, among the numerous researches, some of them are controversial. As far as I am concerned, the money spent on research is a good investment, and the controversial research needs governments' efforts to divert from detrimental to beneficial for human. Besides, the spending of money should pay more emphasize on the exigent research relevant to people's daily lives.

Firstly, it is undeniable that scientific research plays a indispensable role in the development of human beings, so the investment on it is worthy. Besides, scientific research is a innovative task exploring the unknown field, which give rise to the profound influence. For example, the genetic engineering research is conducive to the understanding our human beings on genetic theory, which contains the genetic food and organ transplant. Genetic food is the supplement of our traditional food which has variety of nutrient and vitamins that our human needs. And the organ transplant, which can help those who suffer the cancers and save their lives. Moreover, the research on the macro-economics gives rise to the formation of principle on world economy, which makes humans face the changeable economy more confident and leisurely. And an other example is that, in the research of perpetual motion machine, human understands the principle of conservation of energy. Therefore, it is valuable and worthy for human to invest on the research.

Someone may propound the opposite viewpoint on the controversial research which needs more consideration before investment. They may propose the example of clone and nuclear power research. Admittedly, research on clone may transgress the moral principals and values and nuclear power may bring catastrophe and disaster if the nuclear substance release. However, clone research is one part of genetic engineering, if scientist only use the clone technology on animals and organ transplant, rather than human clone, the result is safe, valuable and beneficial to us. Likewise, human may use nuclear technology to generate electricity with nuclear reactor, rather weapons to set out wars, which is also a good investment for human. Moreover, government and all nations exert their effort to preventing on the research and no nuclear release happens again like the Three Mile Islands and Chernobyl in Ukraine events. The achievement we may see in these years on the control of such two controversial researches. Therefore, if rational and valuable utilize these technologies, it is certainly a good investment.

Thirdly, sometimes, although the result of research is promising, considering the opportunity cost, the economical concepts, money should be invested and put into the more needed field. I have two reasons. Firstly, money is limited; comparing the large amount of research, government and investors should balance the potential values of the research and the cost. Secondly, government and investors should emphasize more on the livelihood and welfare of people. For example, the problem of unemployment, high price of house, food security, and so forth. Some of the arm race for National defense should input less, for the limited money should be put on the where needs most and beneficial to our human daily lives.

To sum up, there are still other aspect relevant to the issue under discussion which, unfortunately, I have no time to explore it in detail here, but the above discussion reasons should in a large sense supporting my conclusion. Scientific research is beneficial to human beings, which is worthy for investment. Besides, government should show more emphasize and spend more money on people's livelihood and welfare.

Logical thinking OR Emotional Intelligence

2008-03-20T02:01:00.002-04:00

Nowadays, in the development of educational system, developing logical thinking is the main task that our teachers undertake these years, however, as far as I am concerned, emotions are equally of importance in the education of students, moreover, in some situations, emotions are the more significant quality that teachers should cultivate with students.

Admittedly, logical thinking is the foundation skill in the studying of natural science subjects, like physics, mathematics, and so forth. Dr. Karl Albrecht, the international recognized author and speaker, once says, "logical thinking is the process in which one uses reasoning consistently to come to a conclusion, and the foundational skill for studying and research." For instance, in the studying of mathematic, students should learn the concept of division first, later can understand the concept of fraction. Then, students can come to the learning of equations in mathematic problems. So it is a sequence and logical thinking coming to the solution of problems.

Meanwhile, emotional intelligence is the significant and essential quality that leads people to achieve success. I have to viewpoint contributed to my claim. Firstly, the optimism and perseverance that in adversity is the decisive emotional quality in the process of pursuing for success. Consider one person who has the merit in logical thinking but easily be pessimistic when encountering the hardships. Unless Karl Max possessed the merit of persistence, he could not finish the book of On Capital, which was lasting for forty years. Secondly, besides, the quality of creation and innovation are also indispensable qualities that are contributing to the great achievement in the scientific research. For example, the great inventions like the theory of Relativity by Einstein in the scientific world, logical thinking is the basic skill, however, the creation and innovation one has are more significant.

Finally, the education of logical thinking is overemphasized in the education of student's nowadays, by contrast, the education of emotion intelligence are sometimes neglected and ignored by our pedagogues. I have two reasons. Firstly, not all the students will go to do research work after graduation, the task of teachers is to teach various abilities for students' later lives, more important the right and positive attitude toward life and optimistic when confronting the hardships in adversity. Secondly, the emotional quality is also important in the students' later work, which involves communicational, managerial and organizational skills and abilities. For instance, the education in university places too much on the theory, even in the application subjects like computer science. One of my classmates works at a software company for two years, and he told me his feeling the abilities to better communicational with your client, which is very essential in doing projects, like a website for company. So often the dilatoriness and delay of projects is attributed to clients' changing demands causing by not better communications with them before.

To sum up, logical thinking and emotional intelligence are equally important in the education of our students. Besides, educators should pay more emphasize on the education of emotions, which nurturing and cultivating the all-around development students that the society needs.

All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students the process of solving the world's most persistent

2008-03-18T14:46:00.000-04:00

The social problems, such as the burgeoning population, racial inequity, aging society, crime, violence and drugs, are existing globally, whether the developing countries or developed countries. Concerning different countries varies in culture, religious, politics and economy; someone maintains that all nations should help support the development of a global university designed to nurturing students to solving the world's most persistent social problems. As far as I am concerned, to some extent, the global university may make some sense in researching problems concerning these problems, but solving them, the effectiveness and influence of the global university are limited.

Admittedly, the global university may be conducive to in terms of going deep into some social problems, with faculties of different countries different society, cultural and religious backgrounds, by contrast to bias and limitations in their own countries. For example, AIDS is disseminating all around the world, and nowadays, the numbers of people infected with HIV is increasing sharply year by year. Both in developed countries like America and developing countries like China other African countries. A global university may concentrate on these severe problems, given the difference in social cultures, customs, religions and economy status. Consider, years before, a large proportion of people in China who infected with HIV by blood, now by sex is increasing. As the same time, according to a survey from New York Times, the homosexual people are rapidly increasing infected in US these years. Before the effective medical methods are invented by doctors, are there any measures we can do to decrease the number of people died by AIDS? Some social notions behind AIDS epidemic, like people’s values and attitudes to sex and homosexual, may be the content to research by the global university.

However, it is dubious and questionable that the effectiveness and influence of the global university, that is to say, is it worthy to support such a global university. Three view points may be contributed to my assertion. Firstly, the university may establish some disciplines, relevant to the social problems, containing the social customs, religious, people's psychology, conduct and so forth. However, this disciplines and academy are well-development in the world-famous universities, like Harvard, Yale, etc. Moreover, in these universities, many professors and teachers are coming from different countries, and they do have the global sense. Secondly, the way to nurturing the students in the global universities is also hard to make a consensus, for no ancestor’s experience we may give reference to. It is evidently university is a kind of place to nurturing students with knowledge and make them all-round mind, not a place gathering the people of problem solvers, and how it is ridiculous. Thirdly, the supporters of the global university is may probably by some large countries, concerning the funds and money are a larger amount yearly, solving social problems may be biased in the interest of some large, and world-influenced countries, the interest of others may be not guaranteed.

Therefore, it is more practical and useful to concentrating on the cooperation between the nations and countries, rather than supporting a global university to do some research on the theory and experiment. In most situations, even if students from the global university conceive a good way to solve these problems, unless the countries cooperate to practice it, how it will be solved? Mostly, the interest of different nations and groups is hard to balance. In my viewpoint, some goal-oriented organization is more practical and effective. For instance, the World Health Organization, concentrating on the health problems happen in the global world, like some epidemic, SARS etc. In these organizations, specialists and professors from all over the world will cooperate and collaborate on the issues and problems, and find the most practical method to solve them. Just like AIDS, I mention before, a similar kind of organization may be established by the United Nations to solve this problems, which is also more economical and flexible. Unlike a university, if you build up it, it is running and management needs many resources and money.

To sum up, a global university is likely is worthy to support or not needs careful and thorough considerations by all nations. To solve the most persistent social problems, all nations should cooperate widely and practically and attitudes and sincerity are the most important, rather the research on the how to solve them.

idol show

2008-03-10T09:02:00.001-04:00

In China, since super girl's vocal, a Chinese version of American Idol is put on screen in 2005, and this two year's TV screen is replete with all kinds of idol show, including singing, dancing and even vigorous boys for coming Olympic Games. Therefore, the young boy and girl crazy for participating in such contests and becoming their idol's fans, considered as a short path to become famous, as overnight fame.

Reflecting on the unprecedented popularity of idol show in China, I maintain that three reasons may contribute to this phenomenon. To begin with, idol show, this kind of TV show is firstly put on the television screen of Chinese, people are attracted by its originality and distinctive features which showing an ordinary person's true feeling and performance during the whole competition, lasting several months. Secondly, people can participate in the competition, using short message sending by mobile, showing your support or dislike of anyone in the show and deciding their scores in competition. Thirdly, a sense of satisfactory psychologically can meet in the participation, just like he or she makes a piece of effort to nurturing their idol changing from a common person to a celebrity within several months. Last but not least, the society's ideas and values change with the development of Chinese people's recreation life, pursuing for individualism of success and opportunism in a more democratic society now.

touching....

2008-02-17T06:23:00.003-05:00

When I was walking through a narrow lane in the YanZhi hill as usual, I saw a little boy, who was standing in the middle of the path, staring at me with nonplussed expressions far from a distance. And the most impressive images lingers in my mind now is his large pair of glasses, maybe he was a hardworking children. However, it is a pity for him to be myopic at such a early age, 10 years old, at most. His images also reminded me that my first near sight at junior school, and father's warning on eye protection.

He fixated on me till I came near, a clear voice heard : " will you walk down through inclined slope?" as my passing by. I lowerd my head to him with confusion, " yes, what's the matter ?" "The inclined slope ahead is slippery, be careful, be careful!"he replied. Surely I was familiar with the path, after almost twenty days falling of snow continuously. After natrual mediations, a warm current flowed through my body and into my heart, "It does not matter, thank you, little boy!" Smiling at the boy with several times turning back, I minced along the lane and strided into a pedestrian walkway.